


It's a Long, Long Way to Tipperary

by KelliDiane



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - World War I, F/M, Genderswap, based at the Battle of Somme, girl!Niall, mostly told in flashbacks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-12
Updated: 2014-12-29
Packaged: 2018-01-04 10:35:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 30,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1079991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KelliDiane/pseuds/KelliDiane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Liam rolls his eyes, but is always willing to take the piss out of Louis. “Wouldn’t challenge him, Tomlinson. I’ve seen his dick. Makes sense why the Irish out number us three to one.”</p>
<p>Harry laughs at that one and is about to comment when there’s a loud crack and boom filling the air. There’s soon more and it’s all one can hear. “Shit. Take your post!”</p>
<p>Niall closes her eyes licking over her lips. It hasn’t always been this way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> If you hate fics where someone dies, TURN BACK NOW.

Harry is quiet as he moves down the trench back to his buddies. He had awoken having to take a piss and realised that the sun was starting to lighten the deep black to a light grey. He tries his hardest not to breathe as he moves back to his spot. The smell of burned flesh and rotting corpses is strong and he prefers to keep his meagre breakfast of stale and mouldy bread down. He makes it back to his post and quickly and quietly shakes the closest to him awake. “Hey. Time to get up. It’s gonna get pretty nasty real soon.”

Niall blinks, eyes opening wide. She groans stretching her arms out, yawning in the early morning light. “Fuck, I think I slept on a rock.”

Louis spits out a mouthful of dirt as he comes to. “Lucky. I thought it was my turn for a rock.” He stands, ducking slightly to ensure that he’s still below the top of the trench. “No one look. I got to piss.”

Liam rouses soon and scrunches his nose at the scent. “God. I thought I’d get used to the smell, but I think it’s just getting worse. All those men…”

Niall shoots Liam a look. “It’s for a good cause. God, I just wish I was in a bed.”

Zayn sighs sitting across from the other four. “I wish I was in my bed.”

"Look, we all wish we weren’t here, but look at the bright side. We met each other and now we’re best of friends." Harry says trying to put a positive spin on the gloomy bunch.

Louis turns back around as he zips up his fatigues and looks over at the other four. “True. I never thought I’d be friends with a posh Cheshire lad or an Irish mate.”

Niall flips Louis off laughing lightly. “Oh and I did see your dick. I see why you’re trying to compensate by coming out here.”

Zayn laughs situating his helmet back onto his head.

Harry just smiles and puts his helmet on. He checks over his gun to make sure it was in working order. He sees the stock pile of grenades and doesn’t want to think about having to use them.

"Really, Horan? I bet you twenty pounds that my dick is bigger than yours. Want to whip it out and prove me right?" Louis says with a giant grin as he straps his helmet on and grabs his ration of bread.

"Ha! I would, but I wouldn’t want to poke an eye out." There’s also the problem that she doesn’t have a dick and the others think she does have one.

Zayn crawls forward not even thinking when he gets in between Harry and Niall.

Liam rolls his eyes, but is always willing to take the piss out of Louis. “Wouldn’t challenge him, Tomlinson. I’ve seen his dick. Makes sense why the Irish out number us three to one.”

Harry laughs at that one and is about to comment when there’s a loud crack and boom filling the air. There’s soon more and it’s all one can hear. “Shit. Take your post!”

Niall closes her eyes licking over her lips. It hasn’t always been this way.

——————

_"Take good care of your mother for me, yeah?" Bobby says looking over at his son. "Don’t ever let her think I’m not coming home."_

_Greg nods and tries his best to not look like he’s crying. “Course, da. She’ll be safe and well cared for.”_

_Bobby smiles lightly and looks over to his daughter. This was the hardest goodbye. He was so close with the girl. “Niall… Please just stay safe. I promise I won’t let those Central Powers anywhere near the shores of Eire. Not as long as I know you’re here.”_

_Niall uses the sleeve of her coat to wipe her tears away. “Why do you have to go, da?”_

_"Because King George demands that every able bodied male under his domain do his part. I have to go, iníon." Bobby kneels down so he’s at eye level with his precious daughter. "You know I’d never leave you if I had a choice."_

_Niall throws herself at him crying into his neck. “Why can’t I join? Only one member of the family really needs to serve.”_

_Bobby holds her close. “Because, filla, you aren’t a man. War is a man’s game, not a place for a young lady.” He pulls back and kisses her nose. “Besides, you and your brother are young. You have your whole life ahead of you.”_

_"But you do too! More than half left! Just please stay." Niall locks her arms around his neck refusing to let go._

_The boat lets out a loud roar as the smoke is released and the British officials are calling out a final farewell. “Let’s go, men! Say goodbye and get ready to push off!”_

_Bobby holds her tighter. “I love you, Niall. So, so much.” He cups the back of her head, stroking her dark brown locks. “Take care of yourself. I promise I’ll be back to see you down the aisle with your hair all done up.” He presses a kiss to her forehead before pulling away and standing up._

_Niall sobs into Greg’s chest feeling everything leave her body._

_——————_

_Greg was hauling the freshly slaughtered lamb into the kitchen when he saw them- two men dressed in the uniform of the Royal Army._

_"Ma? Niall?" He calls them from the rest of the house. He doesn’t want to face this alone._

_Niall walks down the staircase frowning the minute she sees Greg. “What’s wrong?”_

_"Two men from the Royal Army are heading our way. Get mum from bed." He looks down at her with apprehensive eyes. "I know she won’t leave for much anymore, but try your hardest."_

_Niall runs back up, her heart thumping against her sternum. “Ma? Ma, we need you.”_

_Maura looks over to the doorway where her daughter stands. “Not today, Niall. Any day but today.” She says quietly as she turns her back to her daughter. She tries her hardest not to think about the empty feeling on the other side of her bed._

_"Two people from the army are here, Ma." Niall already has a sinking feeling about why they’re here._

_Maura stills before she sits up and stiffly starts her routine of making herself presentable. “I’ll be down in a moment. I just… I need a minute to myself.” She swallowed the giant lump in her throat at the painfully tight sound that was her voice._

_"Alright." She trudges back to the kitchen relaying her words to Greg._

_"Wasn’t expecting much from her today. Her and da have been married twenty five years to the day today." He says with a sigh as a knock on the door echoes through the mostly silent house. "Get the door, Niall."_

_Niall doesn’t want to answer it but she does anyways. “Oh, hello.”_

_"Hello, ma’am. Is this the Horan residence?" One of the men asks softly._

_Maura makes her way up behind her daughter. “It is. How can we be of service?”_

_The men look at each other before the same one speaks again. “Ma’am, we regret to inform you that you’re husband, Robert Horan, was killed in the line of action.”_

_Niall’s frozen for a few seconds. She grips onto the door frame, her entire body racking with sobs. “No! No, please this has to be a sick joke!”_

_The men look at each other before turning back to face the women. “Is there a Greg Horan here?”_

_Maura is doing her best to hold herself together. She pulls Niall into her arms and holds her close. “That’s… That’s my son.”_

_The man nods and slips a paper from his jacket and hands it to her. “These are his papers. He’s expected at the docks in three days’ time.”_

_Niall starts crying holding onto Maura tightly. “Please don’t take him!”_

_"You should be proud to have your family fighting in the Great War. Most families only have one male to give." The man says before nodding at the two and turning to leave._

_Maura pulls Niall tighter to her and shuts the door. “Niall, go to your room please. I have to talk to Greg.”_

_"No! No, I don’t want to go!" Niall is trembling all over her fingers digging into her mum’s arms._

_Greg steps in from the kitchen and sighs. “Niall, don’t worry. Everything will be okay.”_

_"Greg, they want you." Maura says quietly. Her voice seems like a shout though in the mostly quietly room._

_Greg blinks a few times before trying to school his face into one of indifference. “When do I ship out then?”_

_"You’re not going to ship out! You’re going to tell them to fuck off! They can’t have you! They already took dad they can’t have you too!" Niall falls back onto the couch. She’s never cried so much before in her life._

_Greg sighs and sits down next to her. “Niall, you know it doesn’t work like that. If I don’t go, they’ll come here and forcibly take me.” He combs his fingers through her hair. “I’m just glad that you’re a girl and can’t get called into battle.”_

_"But I want to go in! I’m sick and tired of being pushed away like I can’t handle this! I want to join the war!" Niall’s shouting fingernails digging into the upholstery of her couch._

_"Niall, don’t talk like that. I don’t want you anywhere near that awful war. I’m not letting anything happen to you." Maura says with a hint of desperation. "I already lost your father. I won’t lose you too."_

_"Why aren’t women allowed in? I’m capable of doing the labour!" She gets back up feeling determination._

_"It’s not a matter of labour. It’s a matter of you being a woman. You aren’t built for war." Greg says exasperatedly._

_Maura shakes her head. “You can't go. That’s the end of this discussion.”_

——————

Louis ducks down as dirt rains down around them. “This isn’t working! We’re fucking sitting ducks!”

Liam is sitting on the floor of the trench trying to collect all the medical supplies. “We need more morphine. We’re almost out!”

"How are we going to get anymore?" Niall yells dirt and rocks hitting her helmet.

"Not really a concern right now." Harry says as he fires back at the enemy trying to kill them.

Louis stands up a bit straighter, trying to see over the edge of the trench. His head rebounds back a bit as a bullet pings off the front of the metal covering. “Jesus!” He ducks down a bit, taking the covering off and inspecting the dent. “Guess it’s my lucky day after all.”

Niall leans over to inspect it when it happens. A bullet speeds by, wedging itself between Louis’ eyes. Blood sprays out streaking Niall’s face.

"Louis!" Liam’s at his side in a second checking his pulse and breathing. "Dammit!"

Harry looks over in shock at his fallen comrade. The look of fear is frozen on Louis’ face and Harry can’t look. “Li, close his eyes. I can’t… God.”

Niall’s breathing is ragged looking between the three of them. “Anyone have a towel?”

Liam nods. “Not really a necessity on the battle field.” He leans over and shuts the eyes of his friend. “This is absolute hell.”

"I know; just thought I’d ask." Niall tries wiping it away with her hand, but it only smears it.

Zayn keeps his eyes averted. “Now we really have to kill these bastards.”

"We can’t do anything from here. We need more supplies." There’s a pause in artillery fire in their sector and Harry looks around and realises that they’re the only four around. "We need to move into another trench."

Niall isn’t really thinking. She climbs up the trench as fast as possible on her hands and knees running across the flat land. She braces herself for what’s to come.

Harry watches his buddy go. “Niall! Niall, get back here! Niall!”

——————

_Niall looks up at her name being called. She gets up from the plastic chair heading over to the burly man._

_"Nice to meet you, son. Now, let’s get your physical done so we can deploy you." The man says gruffly as he grabs a clipboard and motions him back to an examination room._

_Niall nods following after. Her head feels lighter now that her hair is short and the bandages are constricting her chest, but it’s a small price to pay._

_"So your records are pretty incomplete. It says you’re an orphan? Well, we’re just going to get your height, weight, and blood type." He motions for the boy to stand against the wall so he could measure the boy._

_"I am an orphan." Niall presses her back against the wall closing her eyes. She’s waiting for them to find her out._

_He’s only half listening- staring at a nurse across the way. The measuring tape falls and he glances down. “Five foot seven.”_

_He pulls him over to the scale and pushes him onto the weight. “One thirty, pretty average. You’re perfect for trench warfare.”_

_"Great." Niall keeps the sarcasm out of her voice. This is what she wants though._

_"I need to take a blood sample. Just to get your blood type." He grabs the needle and syringe and looks over at the boy. "You’ll be shipped off probably tomorrow or the next day."_

_"Sounds good actually." She holds an arm out rolling the sleeve of her shirt up._

_——————_

_Louis pops his head over the top bunk to look down at his new partner. “Hey, mate. I’m Louis. You got a nudey magazine hidden in your bag? I need a quick go before starting to kill people.”_

_Niall is just lying out her hands behind her head. She raises an eyebrow chuckling. “Uh, no man sorry didn’t bring any.”_

_"Figures. You’re what? Eighteen? You probably haven’t even seen a naked woman yet." Louis groans but smiles at his bunk mate. "Just kidding, mate. You from Ireland then? Sick accent."_

_"Uh… Yeah. Eighteen, from Ireland, male you know." Niall’s so awkward at these sort of things._

_Louis chuckles before going silent. “They give you any training before throwing you into this hell hole?”_

_"Nope. I assume they assume that I know what I’m doing. Never held a gun before." She shrugs._

_Louis scrunches his nose. “Word of advice? Point the gun away from you and me.” He sighs and rolls back over in his bed. “Just hope you last longer than my last bunk mate. He was Irish too.”_

_Niall nods. “What was his name? Irish people are pretty chill.”_

_"Greg. He was here for two days. Lost him after that." He says softly. "We aren’t sure if he’s dead or if the Germans got him. We just… We don’t know."_

_"Do… Do you know his last name?" She’s riding on this answer._

_Louis groans as he racks his brain for the answer. “Not off the top of my head. Didn’t really get to know each other very much.” He looks at the ceiling. “He talked about his sister and mum mostly. He was worried his mum wouldn’t survive another death in their family.”_

_Niall shuts her eyes tears streaming down her flushed cheeks._

_Louis frowns and looks back over the bunk. “Are you crying? Oh god. Did you know him?”_

_"He was my brother." Niall hides her face in her hands trying to muffle her sobs._

_Louis quickly climbs down and looks around before crawling in with his new friend. “Hey, I’m sorry. He never mentioned having a brother.”_

_Niall doesn’t blame him, trying to hide her face away in the pillow._

_"It’s okay. You’re okay. Don’t worry." He says soothingly rubbing at his back. He furrows his brows when he feels an extra layer of… Something under the back of the boy’s shirt. He lets his hand wander around to the front of the military issued bed shirts and feels the binding under his fingers. "He never mentioned a brother because he doesn’t have one. You’re his sister, aren’t you?"_

_Niall bites into her lip. “Please, please don’t say anything. I’ll do whatever, just don’t talk.”_

_Louis sighs and rests his head against her shoulder. “Fine. Just get me off for the night. It sounds wrong, but it takes my mind off the friends I’ve lost and the innocent lives I’ve taken.”_

_Niall nods quickly. “Whatever you want. Hand, mouth, my cunt- I don’t care.”_

_Louis groans. “Don’t give me the choice because I’ll just want to fuck you.” He slips a hand down over the front of the army issued boxers and rubs at her centre slowly. “Just a quick hand job. Won’t make you do that if you’re not ready.”_

_Niall moans lightly. “I don’t mind. Trust me, it helps that you’re attractive. I’m good with whatever.”_

_He chuckles lightly. “How about this: I’ll keep your secret if you just help me out when I need it. We can start with a handjob.”_

_Niall turns in his arms looking up at him. “I can definitely do that.”_

_"Good." He nuzzles at the skin of her neck and presses soft kisses there. "I’ll get you off too. I’d feel weird if you didn’t get to come as well."_

_Niall’s face turns into a blush. “When I joined I didn’t think I’d be having sex.”_

_"When I joined, I didn’t think I’d have a girl in the bunks with me." Louis says lightly. He dips his hand into the waistband of the boxers and runs his fingers over her folds._

_Niall squeals burying her face into his chest. She definitely didn’t expect this. Her fingers twist in his white t-shirt tugging lightly._

_He presses his face into her extremely short hair and lets his fingers slip between her folds and press harder at the girl’s clit. He moves it in small circles against the quickly hardening nerves below his fingers. “Have you ever done this before?”_

_"N-no, virgin." Niall muffles her moan, starting to drip slowly but surely._

_Louis whines. “Jesus, really? Thought you would have had guys lining up at your door. I’m sure if your hair was longer you would be absolutely gorgeous.” He continues to rub at her clit in little circles. “That didn’t come out right. You’re gorgeous now, but the hair is throwing me off a bit.”_

_"I had hair that went down to my ass. I can’t have long hair though and pass off as a guy." She presses her hips harder against his fingers._

_Louis presses down harder before speeding up his circles a bit. “I would have been at your door, begging for a date, a night, anything you would give me.” His other hand slips beneath her shirt and the binding, thumbing at her hard nipples._

_Niall bites into his shoulder, lips trailing across his neck before she’s coming. “Fuck, Lou, that was amazing.”_

_He chuckles and lets his fingers swipe through the release before bringing his fingers up to his mouth and tasting her. “Thanks, Niall. I try.”_

_"Uh, want me to return the favor then?" She lets her body relax._

_"God yes." Louis says gruffly as he presses his hip into her thigh needing friction._

_Niall reaches her hand into his pants; he’s hot and heavy in her small hand starting to move._

_"Jesus, Niall." Louis groans. "Is that really your- fucking shit- name?"_

_"Yeah. I know it’s a man’s name." Niall rolls her eyes, thumbing over his head._

_"It’s cute. A king of Ireland, wasn’t it?" He’s not even sure of what he’s saying anymore. He’s too focused on the mounting pleasure._

_"How about you stop talking?" She speeds her hand up tightening the hold she has on him._

_He huffs out a breath and buries his face in her neck as he groans loudly. It’s only a few more minutes until he’s coming, release covering her hand._

_She looks at her palm and fingers beginning to lick his come off._

_Louis laughs quietly against her skin. “You’re secret is safe with me.” He presses his lips to hers lightly and quietly._

_——————_

_Harry looks around at the men he’s being thrown into battle with. He has Zayn and Liam with him from the last battle, but there’s two new guys that’s he’s never met. The five of them have been told to hunker down in the trench together. “So… I’m Harry. I’m from Cheshire.”_

_"Zayn, Bradford." He smiles softly rubbing at his smooth jaw._

_"I’m Niall. I’m from Mullingar." She offers an awkward wave._

_"Louis from Doncaster. Nice to see another Yorkshire lad in the field." He says with a pat on Zayn’s shoulder._

_Liam smiles. “Liam, Wolverhampton. I’m the doctor of our small little group then.”_

_"Well that’ll come in handy then! Ah, man you’re all so tall." Niall pouts staring up at all of them._

_Harry laughs and ruffles the boy’s hair. “Pretty sure it pays to be short in trench warfare.”_

_Louis nods and slings an arm around Niall’s shoulders. “True. So only Niall and I are making it out of here. You’re all too tall.”_

_Zayn laughs rolling his eyes. “Yeah, we’ll see about that.”_

_Niall feels more comfortable than she thought she would._

——————

Liam grabs Louis’ gun and ammo, stripping the body of anything valuable before climbing out and running after the blond. “Niall!”

Harry looks after Zayn and sighs. “Let’s get after them.”

Zayn groans jumping up and scrambling across the field hearing bullets whiz by nearly hitting him.

Harry is right behind Zayn, keeping his eyes on Niall the entire time. “Already lost one, can’t lose another.” He whispers to himself.

Niall has her gun drawn shots being fired. A pop fires followed by an immense pain in her side. Her boots skid across the dirt tumbling into the trench.

"Niall!" Liam dives into the trench and lands next to her on a dead soldier. "Oh god."

Harry speeds up and pushes Zayn into the trench. There’s blood saturating the soil and he’s worried. It’s fresh and the source is his best friend. “Oh, shit. Niall… Liam, do something!”

Niall moans eyes staring at the large expanse of blue sky, one hand lying haphazardly on her stomach.

Liam moves his hand, pressing gauze against the wound. “You’re going to be okay. Don’t worry. I’m not going to let you die.”

Harry looks over and sees a medic down the trench a bit, dead. He runs down the dirt tunnel and grabs the kit by the dead body. “Liam! I got morphine!”

Zayn is by Niall’s side squeezing his hand. “You’re going to be just fine Niall, just fine.”

Liam unzips the heavy overcoat and starts to peel the shirt away. “I need morphine and water and…” He stops as he pulls the shirt back to find tightly wound cloth around the chest. “Niall?”

Harry runs back with the supplies and stops when he sees the body. “You’re… You’re a girl?”

Niall shuts her eyes fingers digging through the soil. “Yeah, yeah I am.”

Harry swallows the lump in his throat before shaking himself out of his stupor. “Okay. Okay, Liam patch her up. She doesn’t deserve this.”

Liam nods, grabbing the kit and stabbing her in the arm with the morphine injection. “It’s going to be okay. I’ll fix you up.” He grabs the tools to grab the bullet from her torso.

Niall looks at all three of them. “I didn’t mean to lie to any of you.”

Harry’s at her other side, grabbing her hand. “It’s okay. I think it’s very noble. Pretending to be a man to serve his Royal Highness.”

Niall laughs regretting it almost immediately. “I came here to die.”

"You did? Why? You should be at home happily married and popping out kids." Liam starts with a watery chuckle as he manages to grab the back of the bullet and pulls it out quickly.

Niall hisses, glaring at Liam. “My father and brother died out here and I couldn’t stand the idea of being safe at home while they were in danger. My mother shut herself away after my brother shipped out and I just needed to go. I thought this would be a noble way to die, trying to fight. King George can kiss my ass.”

Liam pours his canteen of water on the wound, clearing it of blood and dirt. “Hey, don’t go blaming King George.”

Harry swallows the lump in his throat. “I’m sorry about your family. I don’t think anyone should go through that.”

Niall feels tears coming down her face. “Just let me die here. I have nothing and no one to live for.”

Harry smiles softly. “Don’t say that. You have me. You’ll always have me.”

————-

_Niall is the trench about a week after training. She’s sitting next to Harry staring up at the stars shining down._

_Harry smiles up at the stars before looking over at Niall. “So how close are you and Louis? He seems really… Handsy with you.”_

_Niall flushes. “We’ve gotten each other off. Just you know relieves stress for both of us.”_

_"Oh. So you’re… A bit bent then?" Harry says with a shrug. "Either way, I don’t care. It’s your choice."_

_"Yeah, bent would be the word for it." Niall laughs at that, but doesn’t let Harry in on the joke._

_"That’s, uh, that’s great. I have to bunk off when I’m alone. No one needs to see that. Not that confident." He chuckles and shifts in the trench._

_Niall watches him from the corner of her eye. It’s hard not to fall for him- she’s pretty sure she already has. “You’re an attractive guy.”_

_Harry looks at her, blush on his cheeks. “Thanks. Just don’t think I’d find someone to be that way with.” He looks back up at the sky. “No one back home would even look at me twice. Too awkward for them I guess.”_

_Niall leans over guiding Harry’s face back around, planting a kiss to his lips._

_Harry smiles and pulls back. “Thanks, Niall. I’m sure some guy or girl will be lucky to snatch you up. Tomlinson sure is lucky to have you.”_

_"I don’t want Louis though." She kisses him again, but this time much longer._

_He doesn’t pull away, but he makes no move to reciprocate. When she pulls back he licks at his suddenly dry lips. “Look, Niall, I’m flattered- really I am- but I don’t like guys that way.”_

_Niall does not take no for an answer. She starts palming him eyes locked on his._

_Harry’s breath catches in his throat and he tries his hardest to not let him see just how much this is affecting him. He’ll let Niall have his fun. His eyes slip closed and his head tips back a bit with the pleasure. He’s only human._

_The smirk grows on Niall’s face undoing his pants and tugging on his cock the head already swollen and dripping._

_The sounds that Harry is trying to repress are slipping through in small breathy shakes as he digs his fingers into his thighs. His brow furrows and his mouth drops open in a small moan as Niall’s rough and callused hands come in contact with his feverish and sensitive skin._

_"You’re bigger than Lou Lou, biggest dick I’ve handled." The only other one she’s handled. Niall spreads his legs climbing in between them. She captures the head in her mouth beginning to bob up and down._

_"Fuck." Harry gets a hand pressed against the short hairs on the back of his comrade’s neck and warns him before coming fast in his mouth._

_Niall swallows everything cleaning his dick off with her tongue. “So you don’t like boys, hm?”_

_Harry breathes heavily trying to catch his breath. He can’t speak. All he can do his stare at the boy who has his cum staining the corner of his mouth._

_"Nice chatting with you, Harry." Niall crawls off to speak to Louis and Zayn._

_——————_

_Niall watches everyone with letters they received from back home. It’s something she wishes she could get, but it’s not like any of her family actually knows where she is. “How’s your family, Haz?” Curiously she leans towards him trying to get a better glimpse._

_The curly haired boy looks up with a soft smile. “My sister got married last month. Mum said the honeymoon was to Ireland since it’s the only country not hit by the war.”_

_Louis looks over at Niall with a sad smile. “Bet it’s the only place in the world that still looks beautiful.”_

_Niall sighs looking towards the ground. “Yeah, it’s always been beautiful.”_

_Zayn smiles staring at a picture he got from his envelope._

_Louis looks over at the Yorkshire lad and tries to climb over him to see what he’s holding. “What’s that, Z? Nudey picture of your wife?”_

_Zayn shakes his head handing it over to Louis. He adds an eye roll in. “You and nude pictures I swear.”_

_Louis doesn’t say anything back as he looks down at the picture in his hand. He smiles lightly and traces a finger over the sheet in his hand. “Zayn, she’s beautiful.”_

_"Yeah. She’s eight months pregnant." He sighs wishing he could have stayed behind._

_Louis smiles lightly. “My girlfriend is eight months pregnant too. Too bad I’ve been in this damn war for a year now.”_

_Liam winces. “Damn. That’s… I don’t even know what to say.”_

_"It’s okay. We’re good now. Apparently the Army had gotten me and another soldier mixed up and told my family I was dead. According to my mum, Eleanor just drank and cried. When they found out I was still alive, she confessed to me that she had sex with a stranger." Louis shrugs. He rubs a hand over the heart of his jacket subconsciously. It felt like a knife was stabbing him there._

_Niall looks over at him feeling a lump in her throat. She tries hinting to Louis after that. “Hey, Lou? I think we need to, uh, stop spending time alone.”_

_Louis frowns. “We’ll discuss that later. For now, let’s see what Payno got!”_

_"Just a letter from my mum. Apparently my dad misses me." Liam says with a shrug._

_Zayn nods looking over at Niall. “Did you get anything?”_

_Niall sighs eyeing her lap. “No, I didn’t. It’s not a big deal.”_

_Harry frowns. “When’s the last time you got a letter from home? As far as I can remember, you’ve never gotten a letter.”_

_"That’s horrible!" Liam exclaims from his seat._

_"That’s because I’ve never gotten one." Niall shrugs. She’s not sad by it._

_Louis looks around. “I’m sure there’s a reason. It’s okay though. We’ll just have to make sure to get you home safely.”_

_A shout throughout the trenches tells them all that it’s time to douse the fires and get some sleep before the fighting resumes._

_Niall gets up stretching slightly. She stalks off to get some water._

_Harry frowns and pockets the letter from his family and heads after Niall. “Hey… You okay?”_

_Niall shrugs. “I’m fine; it’s no big deal. I just don’t have any family.”_

_He heads over and wraps his arms around Niall’s shoulders and pulls him close. “What happened to them?”_

_"Dead, most of them. Don’t want to talk about it." She pushes his arm off._

_He sighs and grabs her wrist. “Hey… I’m sorry. I just feel this need to protect and cheer you up.”_

_"You don’t need to protect or cheer me up. I’m capable of taking care of myself thanks." She tries walking off again._

_Harry doesn’t let him go though and pulls him close again. “You’ve taken care of me plenty. It’s my turn.” He leans down and presses his lips to his friend’s own._

_Niall kisses back- mostly still in shock._

_Harry wraps an arm around Niall’s back and holds him tightly. Quietly and effortlessly, he starts to undo the front of the male’s army fatigue pants._

_"No! No, don’t!" Niall pushes Harry away starting to redo what he undid._

_Harry frowns. “But I… I want to make you feel good. Why can Louis do it, but not me?”_

_"Harry it’s not that. I just don’t want to…I mean, I do but I can’t…" She feels terrible and there’s nothing more that she wants than for Harry to go down on her, but Louis already knows and she can’t let someone else know._

_"No, I get it. Louis was here first. It’s no big deal." Harry says softly as he pulls away and licks at his bottom lip. He backs away and looks over his shoulder. "We should get some sleep."_

_Niall wants to tell Harry she’s not interested in him, but she can’t help but bite her tongue. It’s better he thought that than anything else._

——————

Liam quickly hauls Niall to a sitting position. “Zayn, hold her up. I need to wrap the bandage like a bodice so it’s tight.”

Harry looks back as the gunfire dies down. “She’s going to make it… Right?”

Zayn looks solemnly at Harry. Niall’s been unconscious for a good ten minutes. “Doesn’t look good to me, but I’m not the medic.”

Liam looks up at them, with a small smile. “Her chances are better than Louis’ were. I think that since the bullet is gone and it’s clean and bandaged, she’ll be okay.”

"Do you think they’ll send her home after this?" Harry says quietly.

Zayn worries his lip. “She got wounded, but she’s okay so I don’t really know.”

"But she’s a girl. She shouldn’t be here in the first place." Harry says as he brushes her hair back a bit. "Or will they court marshall her and disgrace her?"

"If they find out she’s a woman who knows what might happen." Zayn sighs feeling bad.

"They wouldn’t kill her or anything… Right?" Harry’s voice isn’t anything more than a whisper. Mainly because he doesn’t want to entertain the thought, but also because without the gunfire, it’s eerily quiet.

"I don’t want anything to happen to her." Zayn runs his fingertips down her stomach.

Harry sits down and shifts Niall into his arms. “You know, I’m actually really excited that Niall ended up being a girl. I was starting to question why Louis and her were hooking up.”

"Is it wrong for two guys to hook up?" Zayn raises an eyebrow.

"Not at all." Harry says shrugging. "Louis has a girlfriend back in Doncaster though and- Oh god… Louis’ girlfriend back home- she’s pregnant."

Zayn stares at the ground tears leaking. “This entire situation sucks! This war sucks! Louis’ child won’t have a father, Niall has no one to return to- this is so fucked up!”

Liam swallows the lump in his throat. “What about Louis’ body? It needs to go back to Doncaster. Someone needs to go at get him.”

Harry bites at his lip. “There’s no gunfire. Do you think it’s safe to go back up there?”

"Of course not. Why don’t we wait until nightfall?" Zayn can’t think of a better time.

Harry nods and looks down at the girl in his arms. “The fact that she’s braving this war because she wants to is amazing. She’s braver than any of those stupid generals.”

"She came to die. I can’t help but think that’s more cowardly than anything." The darker male sighs rubbing at her hand.

Harry shrugs. “I just… Every time we couldn’t sleep, we talked- we got to know each other. There’s just so much about her that you don’t know.”

"Your lips got to know her." Zayn murmurs settling back.

"Well, that helps." Harry says with a laugh. "She just… I would have loved to know her before the war."

"You think she would have been your bird then?" Zayn looks at Harry smiling.

Harry blushes and looks down at the unconscious girl. “Possibly. I can only imagine how great she would look with longer hair and an unbound chest.”

"She looks fine with short hair too." Zayn moves her helmet away touching her hair.

"Definitely. I’m just saying that it would be nice to run my fingers through her long hair." Harry says as he holds her closer. "Just want her to wake up."

Zayn shakes her arm slightly waiting for her to wake up.

Niall’s eyes flutter open staring right up at Harry.

"Hey… You feel any better? Liam managed to get a tight bandage over it and the morphine should be in effect by now." Harry says softly as he wipes a smudge of dirt from her cheekbone.

Liam chuckles. “The morphine is probably what put her to sleep.”

Niall licks over her lips. “I’m okay. It could be a lot worse I suppose.”

Harry nods and smiles down at her before jumping at the sound of gunfire starting again. This time it was closer- a lot closer.

Liam peeked over the trench top. “The Germans advanced. We moved forward a trench and they moved forward two.”

Niall sits up getting her gun. “We need to cut them down. Now otherwise we’re all going to die.”

Liam pushes her back down. “You’re not doing anything except resting.” He takes the gun from her hands and cocks it so it’s ready to go. “We’ll take care of it.”

Niall glares. “This is why I fucking didn’t want any of you knowing I’m a girl! Give me the fucking gun back!”

Harry furrows his brows. “This isn’t because you’re a girl. This is because you’ve already been shot. I watched Louis die, I’m not watching you die too.”

"Right. Come on, boys. Let’s get this shit done." Liam says with a fierce determination.

Niall snatches the gun away from Harry. “It doesn’t matter if I’m hurt or not. We’re brothers and I’m not going to let you three handle this.”

Liam crawls up and aims at an advancing German troop before pulling the trigger and watching as the man grabs at his neck where the artery had been hit and slowly sinks to his knees before falling completely. “Niall, before I hit you with the gun to knock you back out, just shut up and give Harry the gun.”

"Fuck off," Niall hisses. She gets her gun in position firing, watching two men fall.

Harry looks around for an extra gun and finds one- Louis’ he realises as his fingers brush over the etched LT on the barrel- and takes a position next to Niall and drops another guy. “At least get your helmet on real quick.”

Liam looks over at Zayn and tries to convey hope with his eyes. “Come on, Bradford. The sooner we blow these bastards away, the sooner you get home to your abundantly pregnant wife.”

Zayn laughs. He reaches over grabbing Niall’s helmet positioning it on her head for her.

There’s a constant back and forth of fire and Harry can see the enemy dropping as they fire at them. It’s sad that so many innocent men have to die.

There’s a shout from a ways down the trench and gunfire being exchanged there. Liam looks panicked over at the other three still standing. “They’ve taken this trench.”

Zayn is the first to see a man coming up. He shoves Niall out of the way as he feels something pierce his neck.

"Fucking shit!" Liam yells as he places a bullet straight in the enemy’s heart. He turns to see Zayn, a bloodied mess.

Harry is already there, trying to get Zayn to lie still but move at the same time because he’s practically on top of Niall. “What were you thinking, Malik!”

Niall straightens up wrapping her arms around him. She presses her hand against his bloody neck. “Zayn, why?”

Zayn’s extremely pale trying to look at her. “I… Y-you’re my f-friend.”

"Guys, we have to get moving. We have to move back a trench." Liam says solemnly.

Harry looks at him in shock. “You’re a doctor dammit! Do something!”

"It hit an artery or close to one. There’s nothing I can do." Liam says as he looks down to Zayn bleeding all over Niall. "I’m so sorry, Zayn."

Niall feels tears streaming down her cheeks. She leans over kissing him as best as she could. She can feel him slip away.

Harry pushes Liam against the dirt wall. “Why didn’t you do anything? First Louis, now Zayn! You want us dead!”

"I don’t want you dead! There was nothing I could do for them!" Liam yells back, tears gathering in his eyes. "If you think I want them to die then you don’t know me at all."

Niall shoves at Harry’s chest. “Get your shit together otherwise we’ll all die!”

Harry is ready to yell again when he hears the sound of airplanes overhead. He looks up to see guns blazing up ahead. “Reinforcements!”

Niall smiles slumping against Harry’s shoulders. “Thank God.”

There’s the roar of tanks and men running alongside it. One man comes up to the trench. “Is anyone hurt?”

Liam nods. “Yes! Niall needs surgical attention and Harry took a blow to the head. I need to check him for a concussion. They need to be sent back to the base camp.”

Harry frowns before catching on. “Yeah. We need to get Zayn and Louis’ bodies.”

He nods his head. “Why don’t you three head back and we’ll get the bodies taken care of.”

"Please. We can’t leave them." Liam says as he throws one of Niall’s arms around his shoulder and gets Harry to support her other side.

They make their way up and out of the trenches. “Sorry, Niall. I think your cover is blown at this point.”

Niall shushes them. “Let’s just get the fuck out. For some reason my side hurts.”

——————

Niall is glad to have the surgery over and done with, but she’s missing her shirt and binding. She’s topless with her breasts free and exposed. They knew she was a woman.

Harry tugs on the sheet before pulling it aside slightly. “Oh… Uh, can Liam and I come in or do you want a shirt first?”

"I don’t care." Niall murmurs looking at the stitches on her side. She’s definitely sore.

Liam pushes Harry in and shuts the curtain. “Heard they’re sending you home.”

"Yeah. I’m a woman, of course they are. Assholes don’t seem to get that I managed to do everything even if I am a woman. These," Niall grabs at her chest moving her hands, "mean nothing."

"If it’s any consolation, they look great." Harry says without thinking. He looks over her body with a blush. "God, how long were you bound? Wouldn’t that hurt?"

Niall blushes herself. “I was careful to undo it at night. It hurt at first, but I got used to it.”

Liam frowns and sits down by her side. “I’m just going to make sure everything is okay.” He reaches forward and presses at her breasts. “Things seem okay, some tissue around the sides feel a bit tough which could be stress from being trapped, or they’re dying cells. Either way, I don’t think they’re growing anymore.”

Harry frowns. “What are you going to when you get back home? Stay in the kitchen?”

Niall raises an eyebrow. “You just wanted an excuse to grab me.” She turns her gaze to Harry. “Fuck that. I’m going into the work force. Or I could whore myself out.”

Liam smiles. “I promise I had better intentions, but it was nice to get my hands on a woman again.”

Harry rolls his eyes. “Do you know if your mum is still alive?”

Niall chuckles. “Feel some more if it makes you feel any better. I won’t stop you.”

Liam shakes his head. “I’m good, but thanks. They aren’t mine to touch.” He gets up and leaves the room to see if he can help anywhere.

"So," Harry says taking a seat on the bed. "I’m assuming Louis knew that you weren’t a guy."

"We got each other off; he would have noticed my lack of a dick." Niall sighs kicking her legs.

Harry places a hand on her thigh to try and still her. “Stop, you’ll pop the stitching.” He smooths his hand over the army boxers she was still wearing. “They can get you boxers, but not a shirt?”

"They think the shirt would irritate it." Niall shrugs. She doesn’t mind.

He runs his fingers over the smooth expanse of her stomach. “Guess what this means though. I wasn’t lying when I told you I wasn’t into guys.”

Niall laughs nervously. “You weren’t complaining when I sucked you off now were you?”

"I guess not." Harry laughs lightly and looks up at her eyes. "I’m being shipped back to the front tomorrow. If I make it out of this god forsaken war, I’ll come visit you in Ireland."

"If you do that, I’ll fuck you." Niall laughs lightly leaning back. This is the last time she’ll ever see him.

He can’t help but laugh and smile at her. “That’ll keep me motivated.” He grabs her hand and holds it tightly. “I’ll miss having you by my side, but at least I’ll know you’re safe.”

Niall rolls her eyes. “I can very well take care of myself. I’m not some damsel in distress.”

"Trust me, I know. I still feel better about this." He looks down at the floor. "You really scared me out there when you passed out. I thought… I thought you were gone."

"You only care because I’m a chick that you can fuck. You wouldn’t have cared if I was a mate." She mumbles more to herself than anything.

Harry frowns and looks at her. “Hey, male or female- I didn’t want you to die. God, we lost Louis and Zayn so please don’t think I only care about you because of your gender.”

Niall sighs. It’s not that she doesn’t think he doesn’t care, but he’s suddenly interested in her now that she’s a girl.

"Do you remember that night when we were all sitting around looking at our mail? Do you remember what I was going to do until you pushed me away? I don’t care what you have, Niall. You’re an amazing person either way. And you’ve got bigger balls than any guy I’ve met in the service." Harry says quietly.

Niall smiles. “Go back out there and if you really come to Ireland, then you have a surprise waiting for you.”

"Write me. I’ll need some ray of Niall in my life." He squeezes her hand and stands up, pressing a quick kiss to her cheek. "I have to go. I leave in an hour for the front."

"I’ll see you later then." Niall waves smiling lightly.

——————

Sean walks in from the field out back of the house and smiles as his little two year old tottles over to him. He hefts his son up and places a kiss to the child’s cheek. “Hello, Aedan. Where’s mummy?”

Aedan giggles pointing towards the inside of the house.

Niall’s in the kitchen making a batch of cookies with the cold weather outside.

He heads into the kitchen, bouncing his son as he went. He can see the bassinet in the corner of the kitchen away from the stove where his beautiful six month old daughter was sleeping. “Well if it isn’t the most gorgeous girl in all of Ireland. Aedan, why is she in our kitchen? She’s too beautiful for all this. She should be out changing the world.”

Niall laughs turning to face both of them. “Whatever, beautiful my arse. Daddy is mental.”

Sean just smiles and heads over to kiss her tenderly. “I missed you. It was horrible today. Now that the Great War is over, there’s talk of war with England for our independence.”

Niall sighs. “I’ve already been in war. I don’t need to be living in one.”

Aeden kicks his legs trying to get down.

Sean lets Aedan down and pulls his wife close. “If it comes to war, I’m sending you and the kids to England. There won’t be bloodshed on their land, only here.” He rests his forehead against hers and grabs her hips to hold her in place. “Have I ever told you how brave I think you are for going to war?”

Niall smiles back catching his lips with hers. It’s been a few good years since she was discharged. Her hair grew to her lower back and she met Sean. So far things have been great and her mum got over her rut and put time into her grandchildren.

A knock on the door interrupts their moment and Sean pulls back from the plush warmth of his wife’s lips. “I’ll get it. Can you start dinner? I have a meeting tonight so I have to bathe again.” He heads away before she can answer and opens the door of their home to see a curly haired man at their step. “Hullo! Can I help you, sir?”

The man smiled and looked door at the step he was standing on. “Is this the residence of a Miss Niall Horan?”

Niall can hear her name being called. She wonders to the front door eyes widening in surprise. “Harry?”

"Hey… I made it through the war." He smiles softly. His eyes rake over her taking in the differences the years have done to her. "You look so different with long hair."

Sean steps back and invites the man in. “You know him, love?”

"I fought alongside him in the war. One of the only bunk mates that actually survived." Niall closes the door looking towards him. "So you found me. Didn’t think you’d ever come to Ireland." She feels her heart swell.

"Yeah. All I knew was your name and Mullingar. It took a while, but I found you." Harry says with a small smile.

Sean places a kiss to his wife’s hair and murmurs that he’s going to his meeting and that he’ll give them time to catch up. “I’ll take Aedan with me. We’ll eat at the pub.”

"What about Teagen? I know that’s a lot to handle, but maybe drop her off at grandma’s?" Niall just wants to be alone with Harry.

Sean nods. “I can do that. We’ll be out of your hair soon enough.” He heads up the stairs, calling Aedan to get his best dress on.

Harry watches the man go before turning back to Niall. “He seems lovely. Husband, I presume. How’d you meet?”

"Met at a memorial service. They were holding one for Irish veterans. I’m surprised you actually came though." Niall sits on the sofa inviting Harry over.

Harry laughs and sits at the other end of the small couch. “I told you I would come if I made it out alive. I won’t lie, it was scary as hell and I watched so many friends die, but I thank God I made it. After being shot seven times, I thought my luck was running out.”

"Seven times? That’s something else, Harry." She smiles resting her chin in her open palm.

He unbuttons his shirt a bit to show her the scarring at his shoulder. “Liam patched me up every time except the last.”

"Why not the last?" Niall scoots over lightly tracing her finger over his skin.

"He was shot in the back. He didn’t make it." Harry whispers and looks down at the couch.

Sean comes back down the stairs with Aedan before hurrying and grabbing Teagan. “I’ll be home later, love. Nice to meet you, Harry.”

"Bye, Sean. I love you. Love you, Aedan." She waves goodbye, watching Sean grab their daughter before leaving.

Harry waits until the door is shut before speaking. “You have a wonderful family. Sean’s a very lucky man.”

Niall grabs his chin kissing him on the lips. “I believe we had a deal.”

"I mean, you just said I’d get a surprise." Harry said a bit breathlessly. "What about Sean?"

"I love Sean, very much. I remember my words being ‘if you come to Ireland I’ll fuck you.’" She stands up shrugging her peacoat on over her shoulders.

Harry stands with her and looks to her. “Niall, you said that when you weren’t a wife and mother. I’ll understand if you’ve changed your mind.” He’s buttoning his jacket though in his haste to get through the door.

"I don’t want to sleep in my martial bed. Let’s find a nice quiet place in your car." Niall leads him out waiting by his car.

Harry nods and opens the passenger door for her. “You have any spots in mind? I don’t really know Ireland that well.”

"I know a nice cliff overlooking the city. It’s beautiful." She smiles buckling herself in.

Harry smiles as he starts the car and heads away. “I was right you know.”

"Right about what?" She points a few times when to turn and where to turn.

Harry stops the car at the overlook and smiles brightly at her. “You look absolutely amazing with longer hair.” He runs his hand down her long locks.

Niall blushes looking to her hands. “Thanks. You don’t look so bad yourself, you know.”

He leans over and kisses softly at her cheek. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

"I’m positive." Niall reclines the passenger seat all the way back shedding her coat and unbuttoning her blouse.

Harry looks over her and nods. “As long as you’re sure.” He leans over and presses their lips together. His hands quickly find themselves attached to her torso, running over the ragged bump from the stitching all those years ago.

"Here, get in my space." She taps the floorboard with her foot inviting him to climb over. She spreads her legs as an extra invitation.

He laughs lightly and crawls over between her legs. He sheds his jacket and button up, looking at her with apprehension in his eyes. He’s so uncomfortable with all the scars from his time in the service marring him. “I know it’s not as nice as it used to be, but it’s only from all the stitching and stuff.”

Niall rolls her eyes. “I don’t care about any of that. Sean has his scars too it’s not going to turn me off.”

Harry smiles. “I don’t know why I was worried. You don’t care about that superficial stuff.” He leans in and presses his lips to her collarbone before slowly kissing down to just under her breasts.

Niall bites into her lip. She unclasps her bra tossing that in the back with her blouse and jacket.

The green eyed boy groans into her skin before trailing his lips to just over her nipple. He presses a small kiss to the slightly hard nerves and quickly takes the darkened flesh into his mouth.

Niall moans her eyes fluttering shut. “Oh! Oh, Harry, fuck!”

Harry rolls her other nipple between his thumb and forefinger. He looks up at her and pulls his head back a bit. “I owe you an orgasm. If I remember correctly, you went down on me and wouldn’t let me return the favour.”

"There was a reason that it couldn’t happen. If I hadn’t been shot, you never would have found out I was a woman." She wraps her ankles around his waist pulling him forward.

"True, but now…" He smirks lightly before unhooking her ankles and pushes her skirt up a bit before kissing her quickly and ducking under the flow-y material. He presses a kiss to her inner thigh and bites softly at the crease of her pelvis. He hooks his fingers in the material of her undergarments and pulls them aside to lean in to press his tongue to her folds.

Niall gasps, fingernails digging into the upholstery of the seat. Her eyes slip closed and everything melts away until it’s just her and Harry.

Harry pulls the underwear down her legs until he’s not restricted anymore and leans back in to continue eating her out. He sucks her clit into his mouth and runs a ginger against her opening, feeling her wetness start to gather there.

Niall starts rutting her hips up lips parted slightly. She hasn’t felt this good in a long time.

Harry doesn’t disappoint as he moves down a bit and presses his tongue to her entrance trying to build up some sort of lubrication. Once he deems her wet enough, he pulls back so he’s not under her skirt anymore. “Get your skirt off. I’m going to fuck you so hard, Niall. Make you feel so good.”

Niall is so glad there’s a zipper. She tugs on it throwing it along with everything else.

Harry does his best to get his pants and boxers down in the small space. He manages though, and looks at her spread out in his car for him. “Last chance to say no. I don’t want you to feel obligated because of a promise you made years ago.”

"Harry. Shut up and get in me." She glares at him, eyebrows and nose scrunched up.

He laughs and leans down to kiss her unhappy look away as he grabs himself in one hand and pushes into her. His breath stutters a bit as he bottoms out inside her.

Niall’s never felt this good. She could almost see stars, scratching red lines from his shoulder blades and down his back.

He groans as he pulls back a bit and pushes back into her. Once he’s sure that she’s stretched accordingly, he picks up his rhythm and pace a bit and continues to push into her enthusiastically.

Niall’s a shaking mess the longer he goes and the faster he does it. It’s the best thing she’s ever felt. She loves Sean and always will, but there’s something about Harry that excites her like no other.

Harry looks at her as he continues to fuck into her. He feels like this is supposed to be more than just an affair between two old war buddies, but he knows that he could never rip apart her family for his petty feelings. He reaches down and rubs at her clit, wanting to get her off before he can even focus on himself.

Niall comes within seconds, head thrown to the side and her back arched. She bites into her lip, hair covering parts of her face.

Harry buries his face into the crook of her neck. He groans as he comes hard and deep inside her. He closes his eyes and kisses at her neck. “I love you.”

"I love you too. I think I should go though before Sean comes home." She kisses Harry back smiling. Even with her family she’ll always love Harry.

Harry nods. “Yeah… Get your clothes back on and I’ll take you back home.” He says as he pulls out of her slowly, not wanting to hurt her.

Niall is slow to move and slow to get dressed, but she manages to do it clicking her seatbelt into place. She rests her head against the window a hint of a smile on her face.

Harry gets himself together and drives once more. He reaches over and laces his fingers with hers. “I’m really happy that you found someone to start a family with and Aedan is adorable. I’m sure Teagan is just as beautiful as her mother.”

Niall flushes pink. “I’d say so, but they’re my children- I’m biased.”

He pulls up to her home, seeing the lights on inside. “Guess Sean’s home. I should go.” Harry leans over and presses one more kiss to her lips. “I’ll always love you, Niall. I’m so fucking thankful for that god awful war because I met you.”

"Why don’t we hang out another time?" She kisses Harry’s cheek, getting out of the car.

"Actually hang out or just have sex again?" He chuckles lightly. "I head back to Cheshire tomorrow."

"Whatever you want. I’d like to hang out though. I’ll see you around Harry." She waves goodbye closing her front door.

Sean looks up from where he’s rocking Teagan in his arms. He smiles softly as he sees her. “Hey, darling. How was your time with Harry?”

"It was great just catching up with an old friend. You might see more of him around." She cuddles into Sean smiling at their daughter.

"I’m glad. The men at the pub called me mental for leaving you alone with another man." Sean says as he kisses at her temple. He wraps an arm around her waist to keep her close.

"I know that I’ve not been home much lately, but I’ll be here so much more now. I left the IRA tonight. They were talking about more fighting and I don’t want that. I just want time with you and the kids." He pets at her hip before letting it rest on her flat stomach. "Maybe have a few more kids with the love of my life."

Niall looks up at him, kissing his lips. “I love you. I want another kid, maybe start trying tomorrow.”

"Come on. Let’s get to bed. I just want to have a nice night with my wife." Sean says as he steers his wife towards the stairs. "I’ll put Teagan down for the night. Aedan is already out for the night."

Niall heads upstairs to their bedroom getting ready. She doesn’t feel guilty about what happened because a piece of her will always belong to Harry.

Sean comes in about five minutes later and strips down and heads into the bathroom to brush his teeth. He stands in the doorway watching his wife. “Niall? How would you feel if we moved?”

Niall turns around raising her eyebrow. “Move to where?”

"I was thinking Killarney. I don’t want us anywhere near Dublin or Belfast." He looks to the wooden floorboards. He knows that the IRA is planning to move and soon.

Niall doesn’t have Harry’s number. If she moves and she doesn’t see Harry she might never see him, but this is her family. “That sounds like a good idea.”

"You sure? I don’t want to uproot us, but I figure it would be best to do so before the kids started lessons or grow to attached to someone." He sighs and moves over so he’s next to his wife. He takes her hands in his and kisses at her cheek. "I know it’s short notice, but we need to move tomorrow. It’ll be tough since it’s snowy, but I’m just really worried."

Niall bites her lip. She mentally says goodbye to Harry and nods. “I’ll start packing at six am.”

Sean grabs her chin softly and looks at her sadly. “I’m sorry. It’s just… I can’t tell you what’s happening, but I just know we need to get away. We can tell Missus O’Brien down the road where we’re going in case Harry wants to visit, but I need us gone.”

He leans down and kisses her softly. “I just need you to trust me.”

"I do trust you, more than anything." She kisses him slipping into bed.

Sean watches her. “I love you. I love you so much.” He crawls into bed and holds her close.


	2. I am Stretched on Your Grave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Run!" Sean says as he carries his son in his arms.
> 
> This is not what he had imagined when he told Niall they would be safe. He should have known that you can't just leave the IRA. He looks over his shoulder to ensure that Niall and Teagan are right behind him. His daughter's screams pierce the dark night. "Niall, get her quiet!"

"Run!" Sean says as he carries his son in his arms.

This is not what he had imagined when he told Niall they would be safe. He should have known that you can't just leave the IRA. He looks over his shoulder to ensure that Niall and Teagan are right behind him. His daughter's screams pierce the dark night. "Niall, get her quiet!"

"She's a baby, Sean! What am I supposed to do?" Niall tries hushing her daughter, bouncing her and cooing, anything to get her to calm down. They can't afford to be heard. Sean would be killed and Niall doesn't want to think about what would happen to her or her kids.

"I know, I know. I'm sorry." He grabs her wrist and pulls her into an alleyway by two old houses. He holds her close, trying to muffle the sounds of Teagan's cries.

He sets Aedan down and takes the small girl from her mother. "Shhhhhh, Teagan. It's okay. Daddy's got you. Nothing is going to harm you." He looks to his wife, a flash of fear in his eyes before the look turns loving.

"I love you." Niall whispers, kissing Sean and kissing Teagen. She has to prepare though, even though Niall believes that if they're caught they'd use her to get off, there's still a possibility that she would be killed and that would leave her kids alone. She bends down and takes hold of Aedan's arms, kissing his head repeatedly. "Baby, if anything happens to daddy and I, I want you to take your sister and go to someone's home. Anyone's home, okay? I need you to be a big boy and promise me."

Aedan shakes his head, eyes wide and filled with terror. "Not leaving you, mummy. Won't leave you or daddy."

Sean can hear the sound of men approaching and see the exposed light of their torches. "Niall, I want you to take the children and head back towards the forest. Leave through the back of the alley. I'll stall them."

"Sean, no!" Niall whispers. She can't let anything happen to him, she can't. She can't have her children fatherless, even if she was telling Aedan only a moment ago to leave.

He only passes Teagan off to her and kisses her deeply. "I love you, so much. I know you'll keep our children safe no matter the cost."

Grabbing his rosary from his pocket, he kneels in front of his son and grabs the small boy's hand. "Aedan, you're the man of the house now. You have to look out for mummy and Teagan, okay? Daddy loves you and knows how great you'll be when you grow up."

"I love you, Sean, so much." Niall holds Teagan with one hand, using the other to grab Aedan's hand, running as fast as she can almost dragging her son.

Sean watches them go before heading out the way they had entered. He's greeted with about twenty men all glaring and snarling at him. "Hello, mates. Fancy running into you here."

Niall chokes, makes such an inhuman sound when she hears gunfire, but she has to think about her children and getting them out of here.

It seems like forever before she stops running, out of breath and looking down at her son. "Are you okay, baby?"

Aedan looks dead on his feet. "Mummy, I'm tired. Where's daddy? I'm scared. I don't like the dark."

The bundle of blankets covering Teagan starts to squirm as the girl either agrees with his sentiments or opposes them.

Niall kisses Aedan. "Daddy had to go somewhere but I'll...here."

She rummages through her pocket until she finds a small torch. "If you get scared use this."

Aedan nods. "When can we go to sleep, mummy?" He yawns and rubs at his eyes hoping he conveys how tired he is.

"We'll have to sleep here tonight. You can use mummy's jacket and your blanket is in my bag." Niall looks around hoping to find a semi comfortable place, at least she managed to pack a few essentials.

"Will daddy be able to find us in the dark? Should I leave the light on all night so he can find us?" Aedan says as he flicks the light to life and smiles as he can see the small clearing they're in.

"No, baby. If you leave it on the light will die. Daddy won't be joining for awhile. Are you hungry?" Niall carefully sits on the ground, making sure Teagan doesn't jostle in her arms.

He shakes his head no and looks down at the necklace his father handed to him. "I think daddy meant to hand this to you. I don't wear necklaces."

Niall smiles and shakes her head. "It's not just a necklace, it's supposed to give you hope. If you don't want to wear it just put it in your pocket like daddy did."

"Hope? What's that, mummy?" He yawns and tugs his father's blanket from her bag and wraps it around himself tightly.

"Well, you know when daddy would leave for work but you knew he would always come back? You knew because you had hope, you believed he would come back." It's probably a terrible analogy but it's the most she can think of, still holding back a torrent of emotion but not letting her children see.

"Oh, okay." Aedan says no more as he lays down on the forest floor and slowly falls to sleep wrapped in his dad's blanket.

Niall pulls off her jacket and bundles it up, setting it underneath Aedan's head a pillow. She looks down at her baby, kissing her nose. "It's going to be okay." She lies on her back with her daughter settled on her chest. She falls asleep easier than she thought she would.

\------------

Niall rummages through her bag for the hundredth time, Aedan's been asking for food and there isn't any left, it's all been eaten and Niall is so frustrated, could pull her hair out really and she feels utterly fucking useless if she can't provide for her children.

"Mummy, my tummy is rumbly and it hurts." Aedan whines as he holds his sister tightly and pouts as tears start to well in his eyes. "Where's daddy?"

"Daddy isn't here. I already told you. Aedan, there's no food can you wait a little longer?" Niall sighs, exasperated. She closes her eyes and pinches the bridge of her nose. She can't just let herself and her son starve. She stands and packs away the blankets before taking Teagan. "Come on then, I'll find us food."

Aedan stands as well and grabs at her skirt softly so as not to lose her.

They make it a few minutes in silence before the smell of burning plants and even flesh can be found in the air. "Where are we, mummy?"

Niall doesn't answer just ventures further out until she stops and looks down at the rubble beneath her feet when she realizes what's going on. There's charred piles of rubbish, some still burning and Niall thinks she sees bodies. It's enough to remember the war and that makes her weak and nauseous starting to gag at the horrendous smell. It's a burned village. "Baby, we need to go somewhere else."

Aedan frowns and squats down to grab a doll that miraculously survived everything. "Look it! A new dolly for Teagan since we lost her old one!"

Niall takes the toy from her son and she almost throws up just looking at it, thinking about the child that died without her doll. "Another little girl is looking for her doll; we have to leave it here." She ushers Aedan away back into the forest and she really has no clue how long they've been walking when she spots a cabin tucked away in a small meadow.

Teagan begins to whine and paw at her mother's shirt. "Mum mum..."

Aedan just stops and looks at the cabin. "Do you think the little girl lives in there?"

Niall looks down at her baby, and kisses her forehead swiftly approaching the home. It's her only chance to get them fed, possibly spend the night in a warm bed. She heads up the wooden steps with her son in tow, knocking on the door without hesitation.

A tall, broad man opens the door grumpily and looks down at the blonde on his step. "What can I do you for, lass?"

"Excuse me sir, my name is Niall and these are my children. I lost... I lost my husband and we've had no place to go the last three days, but managed to come across your home. Is there any way you could let us stay for a few days? Just to bathe, be properly fed, and sleep in a bed." Niall knows it's a lot to ask, but she's prepared to offer anything if he declines.

The man looks over the three, eyes raking up the slender build of the woman and the exhausted expression on the small boy's face. He smirks and nods. "Of course. A small fee might persuade me."

"I don't have any money, but... I can offer my services in other ways." Niall licks her dry lips, squeezing her son's hand. She feels disgusting doing this right after losing Sean, but these are her children and she'd never let anything happen to them.

"Yeah, that seems doable. Come in, then." He ushers them inside before locking and bolting the door behind him. "Thought maybe you were English shite from Millstreet. About feckin' time the IRA burned their shite down. Oh, I'm Bressie by the way."

"Is... Is that what happened? I saw the aftermath, but I didn't know." Niall awkwardly stands in the middle of his home. "I'm sorry, would you mind if I laid my daughter down then fixed something in your kitchen?"

Bressie shrugs and waves the woman away. "Yeah. Don't be expecting the grandest of dinners though. With Millstreet gone, food will have to be rationed."

"Anything we can get. I'm Niall by the way, my son Aedan, and my daughter Teagan." Niall smiles warmly, lying Teagan out on a pillow she finds tucked away in the corner of the living room. "I can make enough for you as well?" Niall offers leading Aedan to the table to take a seat.

"Yeah. I haven't had a woman's food in so long. It'd be nice to have an actual meal." Bressie reaches down to his belt and lays his pistol on the table as he sits. "So tell me, how'd you lose your husband?"

"In the war." Niall holds up her jacket, but what this man doesn't know won't hurt anyone. She washes her hands and sets to work getting things out of the fridge, finding potatoes, leaks, turnips and broth. It'll be good enough. "Tell me about you. You live all alone out here?"

"Not usually. My wife, Laura, is out in Belfast visiting her family. Feckin' Belfast. It's nothing more than an inadequate, glorified London." Bressie looks over at the kid and frowns. "That a necklace?"

Aedan shakes his head. "It's hope. Daddy gave it to me before we lost him."

"A rosary." Niall supplies, getting started on chopping things up. "So you're married? I don't know how you'd like me to repay you then."

"I thought it was pretty obvious," Bressie says with a shrug.

Teagan starts to cry from her place in the other room.

Niall hurries off, holding her daughter up and smiling at the bundle. "What's wrong. Are you hungry?"

Teagan nods and grabs at her mother's shirt. "Mum mum."

Bressie rolls his eyes and turns to the little boy at the table with him. "So, where are you guys going? Dublin?"

Niall tugs on the drawstrings of her shirt, moving the material away to feed her daughter.

Aedan grumbles, looking longingly at the food still sitting on the counter not yet cooked. "Don't know, mummy said we were going to stay with a friend of hers."

"You need to stay somewhere safe. Dublin and Cork are the only safe places left in Ireland. Everywhere else is filled with nasty English bastards." Bressie says with a taste of dissatisfaction in his mouth.

Aedan frowns. "It's not safe here though. Mummy and daddy said so."

Bressie frowns and looks over to the room where the woman had disappeared. "Your parents lied. It's the safest place in Ireland." He reaches down into his boot and grabs the knife hidden there before stabbing it deep into the wooden table.

Aedan screams, jumping in his seat. He looks fearfully at the knife then up at the man he no longer feels safe around.

Niall comes rushing in, her shirt hanging wide open while Teagan lied in the other room fast asleep. She looks at the scene before her, arms crossed over her chest. "What's happening?"

"Just filling the boy in on where you should be staying and where it's safe from that English shite." He shrugs and looks up to her, eyes zeroing in on her undone shirt.

"Just... Please don't scare him." Niall turns around and fixes the material now that she knows Aedan is safe, heading to the kitchen to continue where she left off.

Aedan looks up to his mother with tears in his eyes. "Where's daddy? I want daddy."

Bressie rolls his eyes at the child like whining. "Your da is dead. IRA took care of his turncoat arse." He looks at the woman at his stove and knows exactly who's in his home. "Isn't that right, Captain Horan?"

Niall tenses, smiling sweetly and looking over at the tall, broad man. "I'd refrain from saying such vile things to my son, I've killed men with my bare hands Mister Breslin and you don't scare me one bit."

Bressie just laughs. "Sure thing. I can tell you where to find your husband if you're looking for him."

Aedan's eyes widen. "Where? Where's my daddy?"

"Why don't you go take a nap or something, lad. Your mum will get you when dinner is ready."

Niall narrows her eyes, but smiles reassuringly at Aedan. "There's a bedroom at the end of the hall, baby. Just nap in there and I'll come to retrieve you. I'll make sure to even make dessert."

Aedan frowns, but nods and does as he's told.

"So your traitorous husband. Want to know where to find him?" Bressie says with a wicked glint in his eyes.

"Dead. He's dead, I'm well aware of what I heard when I ran off." Niall discreetly grabs the handle of the knife behind her, preparing for any attack.

Bressie stands and strides over till he's standing before her. He pets lightly at her hair before letting his hand continue down her arm and gripping her wrist harshly, feeling the knife clutched there. "I'd drop that if I were you. You never know who else I might be entertaining in this small house. Like hidden IRA members who know exactly where your children are."

Niall glares and it takes everything in her to let go. "You're a bit traitorous yourself. Entertaining the thought of sleeping with another woman in your marital bed."

"Oh, I'm not entertaining the thought. It's going to happen. But, if you wish you can start your payment here and now. On your knees, Captain." He brings a hand back up to her hair and roughly pushes her down to the floor.

Niall glares, but looks up at him, hands reaching for his trousers. "You'd trust my mouth near you? Not afraid of a little bite then?"

"Bite me and a bullet goes between sweet, little Aedan's eyes." Bressie says calmly and with a small smile to match.

Niall clenches her teeth. She'd do anything to keep her children safe. "If my children were not here you would have been long killed and left outside to rot."

Bressie laughs loudly and merely pushes her face closer to his erection. "Just suck me off and maybe I won't scare your son again."

Niall does as she's told, pulling his pants down until they're bunched around his thighs, finger grabbing the base and giving a short tug. "Did you know who I was when I approached your home?" She leans in, licking over the head before partially enveloping him into her mouth and sucking, cheeks hollowing out.

"As soon as you showed me the jacket." He moaned and grips at her blond hair tightly. "Now I know why Cullen was so eager to get home to you every night. Shame that his wife is just a toy for others now."

It takes every muscle and bone in her body to not bite his dick off, using her anger to suck harder, scrape her fingernails against the back of his thighs and there's an obvious flow of energy flooding through her. She hasn't been this energized during a sexual encounter since she last saw Harry.

About ten minutes have passed when Bressie finally pushes his entire length into her mouth and he releases inside her warm, wet mouth. "Swallow it all, every last drop, like the slut you are."

Niall doesn't move her tongue, let's it sit there while the cum goes down relatively easily. She stands, grabbing the cufflink of his shirt to wipe her mouth clean. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have dinner to finish."

\------------

The table is silent. Aedan looking around the small cabin and wondering how many unseen people there were. He had seen a few in the room when he was supposed to be napping, but decided to keep it from his mother.

Bressie fills the younger boy's bowl a second time. "Eat up, boy. You never know when your next meal will be."

Niall pets her fingers through Aedan's hair lovingly. "Don't listen to him. Mummy will always provide you with food like I did now."

"For a hefty price, I'm sure. Don't worry though. I'm sure your worth your mum's humiliation and pain." Bressie snickers as he continues to eat.

"Pain? Are you in pain, mummy?" Aedan says worriedly.

Niall shakes her head quickly, kissing his nose. "No, he's just being a bastard. I'm not in any pain. We need to give you a bath before the night is out, we could both use baths."

Bressie is going to respond when there's a knock on the door. "If you'll excuse me."

He makes his way to the door and opens it quickly. "Darragh, wonderful to see you. Come in, come in."

Niall tenses in her seat, mouth going next to Aedan's ear. "If anything happens I want you to go hide in the bedroom with your sister and I'll take care of everything, okay?"

Aedan frowns. "But what about the men in there? They aren't that good at hiding, mummy."

Niall's grip on Aedan's arm tightens by the smallest of margins. So Bressie hadn't been lying. She hasn't felt this powerless since she watched her father and brother leave for war. "It's going to be okay sweetheart, mummy will never let anything happen to you."

Bressie is back with another man in tow. "Darragh, I believe you know our cook for the evening."

Aedan smiles brightly. "Uncle Darragh!"

Niall isn't comfortable, she's known this man for the longest time but she knows that he did nothing to help Sean. She just nods her head once, "Darragh."

"Niall. I've been looking everywhere for you. You're alright, yeah? When I heard about Sean, I didn't know if you and the children were safe." Darragh says as he takes a seat and scoops himself a large portion of food.

Niall grabs Aedan's knee under the table, squeezing. "You'd know I'd do anything to keep them safe, anything."

"Always quick to spread your legs. Told Sean marrying you was like marrying the entire nation." The words are bitter as he tries to sound nonchalant.

Niall scoffs, laughing lightly. "I do it because I need to, what's your mother's excuse?"

Darragh laughs loudly. "Always the spitfire. Tell me, how was the Englishman? Sean trusted you, but I didn't."

Bressie clears his throat. "Darragh, wait until the little one leaves before accusing her of something that vial. Surely she wouldn't allow the vermin of England to touch her."

Niall rests her chin in her palm, smiling. "You mean my friend Harry? He's nothing more than someone I fought alongside. Haven't seen him in so long barely remember what his face looks like."

The room grows quiet as the men eat, watching her every move.

"Mummy, I'm done." Aedan says quietly, unsure of his place at this meeting.

Bressie looks at the boy. "To bed with you then. You can wash in the morning."

Niall tenses slightly. "I want the men out of the guest room first if you expect him to sleep."

Bressie cocks his head. "Fine. Get your children changed and ready while I move the men."

Darragh grabs a cigar from Bressie's box on the counter. "Send them to the living room, Bres. We all need to talk."

Niall ushers Aedan off to the bathroom, changing him into some pyjamas. She's glad she managed to pack some clothes for them, although she didn't have enough room to fit any of hers.

Afterwards Niall goes to the bedroom to see it empty, changing Teagan into a fresh nappie and outfit, tucking Aedan in beside her. "I love you."

"I love you too. Mummy, where is daddy? That man said he knew where daddy was." He needs his father back. He misses him too much.

"Baby... Daddy is in heaven. He didn't want us to get hurt so he had to leave." Niall knows he'll get it, he got it when his nan passed away.

Aedan frowns and shakes his head. "No, daddy said he'd never leave us. Daddy promised." Tears start to spill down the boy's cheeks.

Niall kisses him, hugging him tightly. "I know, baby, I know, but he's watching you and he loves you."

Aedan continues to cry, his tears slowly stopping once he's passed out in his mother's arms.

Bressie pops his head in. "You finished? I have something for you to do."

"Sorry that I was comforting my son." Niall tucks him in, kissing his forehead. There's a noticeable ache in her heart when she stands, seeing the damp patch on her shirt where Aedan had cried.

Niall leaves the lamp on in case, quietly shutting the door and turning towards Bressie. "What now?"

He smirks and starts to unbutton her shirt. "You're going to strip down to nothing but your knickers and serve them. They're thirsty and hungry from hiding all day."

"You're trying to pull something aren't you? Trying to make me feel small?" Niall let's him undress her though. God if her kids weren't here, she would have murdered all the men by now.

"It's not my intention. Trust me. And remember that your children's lives are at stake." He finishes getting her out of her dress and and runs a hand across her clothed cunt. "When it's only you, Darragh, and me left, you'll know that we're belittling you."

Niall narrows her eyes. "I never agreed to anything with Darragh. I agreed to sleeping with you."

He frowns and looks down at her. "And now I'm upping the price. He told me he's been waiting a long time to get you alone."

Niall scowls, she always had an uneasy feeling around Darragh. "That cunt. I'm going to kill him one day."

"Well, today isn't that day. Now get out there and serve them. They were told they could touch you, but nothing else." Bressie informs her of his generosity.

Niall holds her head up high and heads out to the living room where the men were sitting around, talking.

"We head towards Galway morning after next. There's an English stronghold there in the county and we're going to burn it and every last person in it down." Darragh says confidently as he points stuff out on the map.

One of the men, he can't be much older than eighteen, looks to Niall with a blush on his face. "Can I please just have some water? This talk of killing really has stamped out my appetite."

Niall smiles softly and retrieves the glass, handing it to him with relative ease. At least not everyone here is a pig.

"O'Brien, share the lass. I know you can't appreciate a woman's curves yet, but the rest of us are thirsty dogs."

The men laugh and the young boy ducks his head in embarrassment. "Thank you, miss."

"It's not a problem." Well it is, even if he is a nice lad. She crosses her arms over her chest and stands idly by waiting for any other orders.

"Oi, get over here. I was told I could touch and I don't like being lied to." One of the older male's voice says about the chatter. "Maura, the old hag, has nothing on this beautiful flower."

Niall balls her hands up into fists, but she bites her tongue and heads over.

The man pulls her down into his lap and lets his hands rest on her soft hips. "I can actually hold her weight. Whenever Maura wants to sit there, she breaks my legs with her fat ass. Such a cow, that woman."

Niall bares her teeth, her fingers, digging into her thighs and she wants to just strangle him, take an eye out, something. Anything to get him to stop.

There's soon of gathering of men around the only female in the room and there's so many hands.

The man's voice is always in her ear. "So much better than that broken down heifer. Bet your cunt is so pretty and loose. Bet Sean fucked you open every night."

Niall's hands twitch, almost reaches for one of their fucking throats but she keeps her head down, waiting for them to back off.

Darragh and Bressie pretend not to notice and plan their attack. Once they're done that, it's deep into the night and they finally look up to see the scene.

"Men!" Darragh yells. "Let her go. You're all to leave and return tomorrow so we can actually plan this."

Niall sighs in relief once they all stop touching her. She lies back against the sofa, covering her chest with a throw pillow. "Worse than fucking torture."

Once the house is emptied, Darragh makes his way over towards her. "You know if Sean would have seen the greatness that a unified Ireland against England would have been, none of this would be happening. He just couldn't see the good the IRA is doing."

Niall laughs. "Murdering people, whole lot of fucking good huh."

"It's for the good of Ireland." Darragh says quietly as he slowly moves the pillow from her grasp. "Sean always had it so good with you."

Niall crosses her arms to cover her chest, glaring. "Sean had it good? I'm not whatever image you've built me up to be Darragh. If anything I was the lucky one."

"He should never have had you. I told him that you'd fill his head with thoughts of England ruled Ireland. Your fighting in the Great War has only made you sympathetic to those bastards." Darragh says, fists clenched tightly.

"Did I ever tell you I went because I was suicidal? After losing my family I couldn't go on, thought dying in battle would at least be honorable. So I went and I didn't die because of the selfless men I fought beside, the men who sacrificed themselves to keep me alive. And yet those are the bastards you're talking about? Killing women and children? You disgust me. I'd kill you, believe me I would, but you're not worth the fucking bullet."

"Darragh, just... Either take the payment or leave." Bressie doesn't want to mix pleasure and politics.

Niall raises her eyebrow, she's too calm now to be angry. "Go on, do it then."

Darragh looks down and sighs. "I can't do this right now. I have an attack to plan."

Niall sits up, a bit relieved really, but she doesn't let that show instead she shrugs her shoulders nonchalantly watching him leave. "I'm exhausted, I need a bed."

Bressie smirks. "Come on. I have a place you can sleep."

Niall has a feeling she's not going to be sleeping but she really doesn't have much of a choice. She just gets up and tiredly follows, feet dragging and her knuckles rubbing at her eyes.

Bressie picks her up and carries her to his bed. "I want my payment."

Niall rolls her eyes, head resting against his broad chest. "Alright. How do you want me?"

"Want you to ride me. Tell me how grateful you are that I took you and your children in." Bressie drops her on the bed and looks down at her.

Niall hooks her fingers in her underwear, shucking them off and tossing them into a random corner before getting onto her knees. "Talking about my problem is going to get you off?"

Bressie's shrugs as he strips himself and starts to stroke his cock to full hardness. "More the fact that you have to whore yourself around. God I wish I could see Sean's face, wish he could know what a slut you are."

Niall scowls. "Let's not talk about him. None of your men are here and I'm very capable of murder."

"I think it's cute that you think I'm alone. There's always someone here. I'm the leader of the IRA, sweetheart." He lays back on his mattress and beckons her over.

Niall sits on his legs, starting to suck and lick three of her own fingers. She's going to make sure this doesn't hurt, even if it will emotionally.

He frowns. "I don't want you to be prepped. I'm going to stretch you wide open. Now, hurry up."

Niall glares. "Are you fucking kidding me? Are you trying to break me? I need to be prepped or I won't be able to move."

"What's the matter? Afraid you won't be able to be on the run from us?" Bressie chuckles as he grabs tightly at her wrist.

"I have children to take care of you tosser. You were friends with Sean weren't you, why would you want to sleep with his wife?" Niall still doesn't understand how they can turn their back on someone they considered a friend.

Bressie suddenly becomes angry. "No friend of mine would ever leave the IRA. They wouldn't be okay with the English bastards living free on Irish soil. They certainly would never leave their wife alone with an Englishman who came to visit."

Niall huffs a laugh. "What do you want me to say? That I've fucked an Englishman? I've fucked two, one multiple times while I served. Still want to touch me after I've been soiled?"

"You let those filthy bastards touch you even when you were married to Sean. He loved you so much and you broke his trust. You're nothing but a dirty whore." Bressie says venomously. He uses the grip he has on her to shift them and pin her down on her back. "And that's what I'll treat you like. A whore, an object not worth my time except for when I need release."

Niall laughs, laughs so hard it hurts. "Talk all you want but you're no better. Worse even. The Englishmen are better than you paddies."

"Better than your own husband?" Bressie says as he pushes her legs apart and lines himself up at her entrance.

"Except for him, he saw through your bullshit." Niall spits, hands digging into the sheets.

Bressie laughs loudly and pushes inside her. He groans and tips his head back at the tight heat surrounding him. "Want to know a secret about your dear husband? He begged for mercy in his final moments. He was weak and timid. It was a joy to be the one to put a bullet between his eyes.

Niall knows, watching him laugh, that she's going to be the one to kill him. "Not a coward like you."

The male just continues to laugh and hold her down as he rocks into he relentlessly. "Fuck you like the bitch you are."

The door is suddenly creaking open and there's a timid and shy voice. "Mummy?"

"Aedan, go away!" Niall shouts, she can't let him see her, not like this, weak and vulnerable and being taken advantage of.

"Mummy! Stop! You're hurting her! Stop! Stop! Stop!" Aedan watches in horror as this man does something to his mother. He doesn't understand what's happening, but his mother sounds unhappy.

Niall starts sobbing, she doesn't want Aedan is to see her like this. "Baby, please, please go."

"Mummy..." Aedan can't leave. He promised his daddy he'd protect his sister and mummy. "Please stop. I promised daddy..."

Bressie laughs at that. "You shouldn't make promises that you can't keep."

"Aedan, I'll be fine. This is just a bad dream." Niall hopes it's convincing enough, that he'll cry in the morning and tell her about it and Niall will reassure him.

Bressie moans loudly as his hips stutter to a stop and he's coming deep inside her. He lets go of her wrists and pulls out from her and groans. "Clean me off, whore."

Aedan is still there, sniffling and crying. "You hurt mummy."

Niall reaches for her clothes, takes time tugging them on before she carefully stands, crying out at a sharp pain. It takes a long minute to compose herself before she can get a wet washcloth to clean the man off with.

Aedan is crying and reaching for his mother. He wants to be held by her and be reassured that she's okay.

When Niall is allowed to leave she kneels down, grabbing Aedan's arms, trying to ignore the way her lower half burns. "I'm okay baby, mummy is fine. I promise."

His sobs are reduced to hiccups and sniffles. "He didn't hurt you? He looked like he was."

"I know, baby, but mummy accidentally twisted her ankle. Daddy always said I was clumsy." She picks Aedan up, even if it pains her to do so, and walks towards the guest room where Teagan was still sleeping.

"Will you stay here and cuddle with me? I don't want to sleep without you. That way I know you're safe." Aedan says softly, exhaustion sweeping across his face.

"Of course baby, I'll be right next to you." Niall tucks Aedan in before getting in herself, being careful not to jostle the baby or to move too much. This is all fucked up.

\------------

Bressie awakes to the sound of crying and he groans. This woman has officially overstayed her welcome. Donning some trousers, he heads to the living room to see her feeding her daughter and her son sitting quietly next to her.

"Niall, you need to go. I gave you food and lodging. My part is done." He yawns and scratches at his hair as he looks to her.

"I was thinking the same thing. Let me finish feeding her and I'll be on my way." Niall looks down at Aedan, hair slightly damp from his bath earlier. He made no move to argue with her though and Niall was a bit surprised considering it was always a battle to get him to bathe sometimes. He got in no problem though and Niall wonders if it has anything to do with the night before.

Aedan looks up at the man and curls against his mother.

Bressie nods and awkwardly scratches the back of his neck. "Patrick will escort you out."

"Alright." Niall pulls Teagan away when she's done, fixing her shirt up once more.

Patrick steps out from the guest room the small family was sleeping in and stretched. "Right, boss. Where should I drop them?"

Bressie shrugs. "Don't really care where. Just push them East."

Niall gets her things together and packs some food, something Bressie allowed after making her suck him off again. She cradles Teagan and gestures to her skirt for Aedan to grab a hold of. "Right, well thank you. Even though I'd rather slit your throat than say it, but thank you."

"Such a spitfire. I'll never understand how Sean could marry such an untameable woman." Bressie sighs. "I hope you make it wherever you are heading safely."

Niall smiles softly, the only kind gesture she'll give him and heads out with her children. She looks behind at the man. "If you could make it so you're at least ten feet back I'd appreciate that."

"Can't be that far, but I can step back some." Patrick says as he waits a good distance for them to get ahead. "So where are you heading? I can at least steer you in the right direction."

"Belfast." Niall looks back up ahead with an upturned nose, nudging her son and smiling softly.

Patrick frowns and stops in his tracks. "Belfast? That's English controlled territory. Why would you head there?"

"Don't ask questions. You were told to take me where I was going so I expect that." Niall doesn't need to explain herself to the likes of him.

"Look, I know it isn't my place to say anything, but the English are brutal. I watched as the killed my father just because they couldn't understand him through his accent. Maybe you'll fare better since your accent is faint and barely there and you sound more English than Irish, but think of your children."

Niall stops in her tracks. "Don't you dare, ever tell me to think of my fucking children. What the fuck do you think I've been doing? Do you think I'd just sleep around after your men killed my husband? I know what I'm doing, I've seen more war than you will ever experience in a lifetime don't tell me to think of my children."

Patrick holds his hands up. "Sorry. Just... They'll separate you. They killed my father and took my mother. I was four. Told me to fend for myself and maybe there would be hope for the Irish. I just can't believe anyone would want to willingly head to their territory."

Niall lifts her jacket up. "They'll recognize me right away, Captain Horan. An Irish woman who fought alongside Englishmen."

"Don't count on it." Patrick mumbles back to the woman. He looks down at her son in pity. "Your mother has too much faith in a people who have no problem slaying anyone who sound different from them."

Aedan cocks his head to the side. "The English bastards?"

Niall scowls. "They are not bastards. You're trying to tell me about this shit when the Irish have hurt me more than any Englishman."

Aedan shrinks against his mother. "Mummy, he's scary."

"Just wait. You'll see, Niall. You'll be just another Irish to slaughter." Patrick says softly.

"Stop talking to us." Niall turns around and storms off, almost dragging Aedan behind her.

"Niall, stop!" Patrick calls after her as she speeds off.

"Mummy? Are we English?" Aedan asks fearfully.

"No, we're Irish. Those men are filthy liars, there's nothing wrong with the English, Aedan; they're friendly." Niall doesn't listen to the man though, just continues on her way.

Aedan looks to the ground. "Why does everyone hate them? And why does that big guy call them English bastards?"

"I don't know, love, I don't know." Niall can't explain it, Aedan wouldn't understand at his age.

Teagan squirms in her mother's arm and squints at the bright light that greets her. "Da da..."

Niall just kisses her daughter's forehead. "I know baby, I know. We have to keep going though, to Belfast."

\------------

Niall's drained, lost all energy and now she's trying to carry both Teagan and Aedan. Aedan's been crying about his feet hurting and complaining about food but they've run out and Niall can't stop and rest when they need to stay somewhere, anywhere at this point.

Aedan yawns against his mother's shoulder. "Mummy, Teagan is biting me." His voice is muffled and laced with exhaustion as his sister whines into his ear.

Niall looks down and sighs. "We're going to take a little break here."

She sets Aedan down and undoes her shirt, adjusting Teagan to her chest.

Aedan sits heavily on the ground. "Mummy, I'm so hungry. I need food."

Teagan sucks happily at her mother's chest, feeding from the woman's breast.

Niall nods her head. If they didn't get there soon she's not opposed to killing an animal. "We'll have food soon I promise."

There's a rustling in the trees around them and suddenly they're surrounded by a group of men.

"Oi! Who are you?" An English accent shouts at the group before them.

Niall startles and she almost immediately raises her jacket in the air, showing it off. "My name is Horan, Captain Niall Horan."

"Hold it." A young english boy steps forward. "Niall Horan? The Irish Woman? You fought beside my father in the war."

Niall frowns, looking over his facial features and when she realizes who she sees her face immediately softens. "Your Louis' son."

"William Tomlinson. General Styles told my mother and I lots about you." William smiles and reaches out for her. "Come on. You'll be a guest in my home."

Niall squeezes his fingers, she can see so much of Louis in William it makes her heart ache thinking about him. "These are my children, Teagan and Aedan."

"They look exhausted. Come on. There's an extra bed and plenty of food for you all." William bends down and scoops Aedan into his arms. "Your mother saved my father's life many times."

"She did? How?" Aedan sounds awed.

Niall smiles, it's the first genuine smile in a long time. "Mummy went to war and I met his daddy there and we became friends. I always watched out for him, took a bullet for him."

Aedan smiles and looks to his mother. "So the English are friends? Not bastards?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. English bastards?" William frowns and looks at the woman.

"Aedan!" Niall glares before turning her eyes to the boy. "It's a long story, ignore him though."

William nods. "To Mallow then?"

\------------

William moves the dishes from the table to the sink. He pours Niall a cup of tea as she returns from ticking her children in. "So where have you been the last six months? General Styles said he went to visit you and found you're home deserted."

"My husband left the IRA, wanted to come here, but you can probably imagine how they took it. My husband Sean... He was killed and I ran off with my children before anything could happen." Niall frowns, she looks at the boy and he looks almost exactly like Louis.

"That's horrible. So their dad is... He's gone?" William sighs. "I know what it's like to grow up without a dad."

Niall nods reaching across the table to squeeze his hand, it's the least she can do. "He was extremely lovely, nice, funny, a bit of a tosser but he'd always take the piss out on everyone. He was the heart of our little group."

William smiles softly. "That's what Harry told me. He's also connected me to Zayn's daughter. She's the most beautiful girl I've ever seen."

Niall chuckles a little disbelieving, it's been so long since she thought of her boys and to hear their names again, it's incredible. "Reckon there's something between the two of you then?"

"I wish. She's engaged to her best friend." William says sadly. He looks down at his tea and sighs.

Niall kisses his temple lovingly. "You're a catch, William, remind me a lot of your father. If he hadn't been with your mother I might have married him. You'll find someone eventually."

William shifts uncomfortably in his chair. "Can you answer a few questions about my father?"

Niall nods, drinking from her tea. She feels so much better in her nightgown Eleanor let her use, hair washed and braided. "Of course."

"Harry won't tell me how he died. Do you... Do you know?" William says quietly, scared that he was asking too much.

Niall wonders why Harry won't, it's not like he betrayed them or something. She decides to embellish it though. "We were in the trenches and he pushed me down, bullet hit the lip of his helmet."

"He was shot in the head?" The boy takes a deep breath as he tries to process that. "He died saving a friend..."

"He did. It was quick. Liam, our medic, said he didn't feel a thing." Niall's voice is light, afraid that if she's too loud it'll interrupt the intimacy of their conversation.

There's a long stretch of silence before William looks up. "How close were you to my dad? Is there anything you can tell me that Harry can't?"

Niall sits back and thinks. "I loved your father, really did. I was never so close with anyone than I was with him. He cried every time he killed someone, he hated being there- didn't want to do it- but he did it for his country. He loved bird watching, weird quirk I thought, but he did it. He'd get up before everyone else to watch the sunrise and would watch the sun set, he liked the predictability. He wrote your mother every day, carried her picture everywhere, and he would tell me things about you. Told me how much he wanted to be a dad, told me he had so much love to give, and he told me you were possibly his greatest accomplishment."

"He sounds like an amazing man. I can only hope that I'm half as great of man as he was." William says as he blinks back tears. "I'm so sorry your children lost their father. At least they have a wonderful woman to look after them."

"Nothing runs deeper than a parent's love for their child. I'll do anything for my kids, I've already done a lot just getting here." Niall looks at the fading bruises on her wrists where Bressie had her pinned.

William's gaze follows hers to her wrists and his grip around his tea cup tightens considerably. "Who did that to you?"

Niall startles and puts her arms underneath the table and out of view. "No one, it's nothing."

"Tell me. I can't let them get away with this. Was it an Englishman?" He hopes to God his fellow country men haven't stooped to that level of disgusting acts.

"No, it was some... Some members of the IRA. I needed a place to stay and I didn't have money." Niall hopes he can fill in the blanks after that. She still feels disgusting, used, but she had to do it. She couldn't let Aedan starve or leave Teagan alone in the forest if both her and Aedan starved.

William is filled with rage. "These Irishmen think they're so much better than us, but they sit around and rape their own women. This is why England needs to be here. We need to teach the Irish how to be civilised."

Niall squeezes his knee under the table. "Not all Irishmen. My husband was never like that and I've some wonderful friends and family that are Irish."

"Right. Right, I'm sorry." The male sighs and reaches across the table to rest his hand on top of her own. "I should probably get some sleep. You and your children are more than welcome to stay as long as you need or want to."

"Just another day or two. Want them rested and fed." Niall stands setting her glass with the other dirty dishes. She kisses William's cheek. "You're a very lovely lad."

"If my dad hadn't met my mother, I would want him with you. You care so much." He tugs into a tight hug. "Thank you for everything you did in that horrible war."

Niall is a little surprised, but she hugs him back. "Didn't imagine I'd serve but I'm glad I did. I think I'll go join my son and daughter in bed now."

"Good night, Captain Horan."

\------------

Harry sits at the desk in his office pouring over a map of Ireland. Being appointed General of the England's armies had its perks. "Corporal, if anyone returns from the island I want them in my office immediately."

The Corporal nods leaning casually against Harry's desk, being friends made things more comfortable. "They found the body of an ex IRA member."

"Ex IRA? Sounds like something we shouldn't be interested in. Did we identify the body?" Harry says as he tries to plan a march for his troops to get to the Irish cities in time to protect them from the IRA.

"A man named Sean Cullen." He shrugs. It had been something he heard from his men.

Harry stops and looks up at his friend. "Are you certain about that? I need hundred percent accuracy with a claim like that."

"The leader of the IRA made no secret about it. Said he was 'housing' his wife and kids."

"What! What town? We have to get them out of there." Harry says in immediate panic.

"Harry, we can't do anything." He sighs. It's not like they can just storm over and get a couple of people.

"We have to! His wife is... Important to me. I need to make sure her and the children are okay." Harry says stressed out all of the sudden.

"How do you know his wife?" He asks, curiously.

"She..." Harry stumbles over how to explain the woman that means a lot to him. "She served beside me in the war."

The corporal is silent, trying to piece things together. "Wait, Captain Horan?"

"Yes. She married IRA member Sean Cullen and has two children. The last night I saw her, Sean was at an IRA meeting before they disappeared." Harry says quickly.

"There's nothing we can really do Harry, this isn't our problem."

Harry runs a hand through his hair. "Just... Keep me updated on anything you hear about her."

"I'll try." He can't promise anything, but he'll do what he can.


	3. Some Say the Devil is Dead

Niall watches Aedan finish up his breakfast from where she's leaning in the doorway of the kitchen, smiling fondly. She would do anything to protect her children. "Thank you for letting us stay here." She looks over at William who's playing with Teagan.

He smiles brightly up at her, boping Teagan on the nose softly. "It's my pleasure. I only wish I had found you sooner. I have a letter for you to take with you when you go. If any Englishmen give you trouble, show it to them."

"What does it say?" Niall straightens out and heads over to Aedan, grabbing his empty bowl and setting it in the sink.

"You're protected and not to be harmed. If the orders aren't followed they'll have to deal with General Styles and myself." William says with a shrug as he stands with Teagan in his arms.

"Thank you." Niall comes around the counter and kisses his cheek. "You're a good man, just like your father."

William's eyes lower to the ground. "Sometimes I wish I had known him. I just really wish I could know if he'd be proud of me today."

"He would be so proud." Niall assures, taking Teagan back into her arms. "Should probably feed this one before we leave."

Teagan pouts as she taken away from her new best friend, but quickly smiles up at her mother.

William chuckles as he watches the small girl. "I'll give you so privacy then. Maybe show Aedan how to effectively cover tracks in woods."

"I think he'd like that." Niall looks over her shoulder at Aedan. He's been so quiet since he walked in on her and Bressie it hurts her a little.

William whispers to Aedan and the smaller boy nods before they both head out of the makeshift house.

Teagan whines as she grabs at Niall's necklace.

"Hungry, little one?" Niall sits on the sofa and manages to undo her shirt with one hand, peeling it away to let Teagan have access adjusting her against her chest.

The small child latches onto her mother and starts to drink.

A slightly older woman enters the room and smiles at them. "Ah, I remember having to feed William that way. That boy drank me dry everyday."

Niall smiles only for it to turn into a grimace, gasping. "Oh! That hurts!"

Teagan whines at the sudden movement of her mother's chest which caused her to be out of reach.

"You okay?" The other woman asks gently, coming to her side in case aide was needed.

"That was bloody painful." Niall rubs at her chest to soothe it looking down at her baby.

The woman frowns. "How old is she?" She runs a finger along the small child's leg, hoping to calm her.

"A little over a year." Niall knows she's hungry but that was too painful.

"She needs to start on more solid foods. You're not producing enough anymore." The woman says with a tight lipped smile. "I'm Eleanor, by the way. William is my son."

Niall should have expected it, but it still surprises her. She'll always feel a little guilty about her and Louis. "I can't do that, I don't have the resources to feed two children."

"Sweetheart, William has a small bag of provisions for your journey. It won't be nearly enough to get you to London, but you should make it to Dublin at least." Eleanor says with a soft smile.

"Only if you're sure, I feel like I've been enough of a burden." Niall sighs cooing at her crying daughter.

The woman shakes her head and pulls Niall into the kitchen to have her sit down. "It's fine. William doesn't even want to let you go. He wants to take you to London himself, but he's under orders to stay here." She starts to boil water so she can soften some carrots and potatoes.

Niall watches as Teagan tires herself out from crying. "I wouldn't want him to do that and take up all his time. I know I can make it."

Eleanor smiles and nods. "You were in the military, of course you can make it." She bites her lip to stop herself from asking. She sighs. "You fought with my Louis, right?"

"Yes, I did." Niall looks at the picture of Louis hung up on the wall near her, he was young and that alone makes her stomach flip because he died young.

"He wrote about you a lot. I was so grateful that you were his friend. Sounded like he really needed you." Eleanor said softly as she drops the vegetable into the boiling water.

"We were there for each other through everything. He became my brother." Niall feels more guilty, she had betrayed Eleanor and the woman doesn't even know.

She nods with a small smile on her face. "Doesn't surprise me. Had four small sisters back home that he missed terribly. Even now there's five sisters and a brother."

"He was a very caring person, talked about you all the time." She smiles at the woman standing at her stove.

Eleanor stirs the food, hoping to cook it through evenly. "Niall, as much as I appreciate it, I know what you two were up to. Louis told me in letters. If it makes it any better, I told him to go for it."

Niall looks down at her lap. "I tried breaking it off when I found out how serious you two were. I didn't... I still feel guilty about it."

"He apologised a thousand times in a letter. I don't blame either of you. I'm just happy it was you and not the enemy. So many woman have stories of their men having kids from the enemy and I'm glad that at least had a willing partner." Eleanor says as she checks the food. Seeing that it's done, she drains the pot and begins to mash the vegetables together.

"He's not that type of man, he wouldn't take advantage of a woman." Niall tenses slightly thinking about Bressie and what happened at his house.

Eleanor finishes the food and puts it in a bowl with a spoon for Niall. "She may eat this. Try it."

"Teagan, wake up. Are you hungry?" Eleanor kisses her daughter's forehead shaking her lightly.

Teagan slowly opens her eyes, brows furrowed in annoyance. She looks up at her mother expectantly, as if she's going to do nothing at all.

Niall nudges the spoon against her mouth, nodding her head like she's urging her to go on. "It's yummy, I promise."

The small bundle skeptically opens her mouth and takes the spoon being offered. She swallows and gives no sign that she likes it, but she doesn't fight either.

Eleanor chuckles. "You've got yourself an obstinate little girl."

"She's something alright." Niall keeps spoon feeding her, trying to coo and make silly faces.

Soon enough, Aedan runs inside- out of breath and smiling widely. "Mummy! William showed me how to cover our tracks and catch squirrels! Now I can be the man of the house!"

William follows him in a moment later, smiling proudly down at the boy. "He's a natural. Caught onto everything rather quickly."

"That's perfect! You can protect me and Teagan." Niall cheers, sighing when she looks down at her one year old. "Do you like it? I can't tell!"

The girl says nothing, just staring up at her mother with disinterest.

William chuckles and reaches out for the girl. "Here. Let me try."

Figuring it can do no harm she hands her off, being mindful to not drop her. "She's stubborn."

"Hey there, gorgeous." William coos.

Immediately, Teagan's face lights up in a grin. She's squealing and reaching her hands up for his curls.

"Ah, ah, ah. You need to eat for me. Can you do that?" He holds a spoonful up to her, smiling when she immediately eats it.

"Of course." Niall rolls her eyes but she can't help her smile. "She has her first crush."

William laughs lightly. "Don't worry, Teagan. I'll wait till you’re eighteen before asking for your hand. I'll only be thirty six." He kisses her cheek lightly.

Aedan scrunches his nose in disgust. "Ew! No kisses! Teagan doesn't have cooties and you'll give them to her!"

"Aedan is right. Kisses give girls cooties." Niall pulls her son into her lap kissing along his jaw.

And just like that, they're all laughing and enjoying their last day together.

\------------

Niall turns over on her side, eyes opening when she hears someone rummaging around. She's quiet, careful to look over her shoulder to see who it is.

William is on the floor, shoving more stuff in the small bag Niall was taking with her tomorrow. A matching bag sat beside her own and he’s filling that as well. He wanted to ensure their safety and survival.

"William?" Niall asks, slowly sitting up to ensure neither of her kids would wake up. "What are you doing in here?"

He looks up and smiles nervously. "I was just... Checking your bag? I mean, you can never be too sure about supplies."

"While I'm asleep? This couldn't have waited until tomorrow?" Niall checks to make sure Aedan hasn't woken up.

William looks to the ground knowing he had been caught. "I was packing a second bag because I'm going to follow you guys. I need to make sure you get there safely."

"You have orders to stay here." Niall stands and lightly pushes him back away from the bags.

"I'm sure General Styles would understand. Besides, the IRA is closing in. We have reports that says they'll be here and ready to go within the next two days. We'll all have to leave anyway."

"You can't come. I've already been told by your mother." Niall won't let him get in trouble over her.

"I can protect you though!" He whisper-yells at the woman. "Niall, please. I'll get Teagan to eat and make sure no one harms you."

"No, William, you're staying here. I'll be alright, I've always been." Niall assures, squeezing his shoulder.

He looks to her with a worried expression on his face. "But what if they find you and not my men? Niall, you could be killed if the Irish get a hold of you."

"William." Niall glares. "I've fought in the war. I think I can handle a few IRA members if I need to."

"Fine," William says softly as he tries to contain his pout. "Still doesn't mean I have to like it."

"I know, I know, but once I reach Harry I'll be sure that he calls you to let you know I made it safely." Niall kisses his cheek, she appreciates the concern.

William smiles and kisses her cheek. "I should let you get back to bed. Sun comes up in a few hours."

"Need all the rest I can get." She climbs back into bed, stretching her arms out before settling in.

\------------

Eleanor hugs the children tightly, wanting to keep them safe in her arms. "You guys are going to have such an exciting trip. You'll forget all about boring old Mallow soon enough."

Niall chuckles. "I don't think that's possible. You and William have been a great help to all of us."

Aedan pouts and hugs the woman's legs. "Do we have to go, mummy? I want to stay with Will."

William is silent as he holds the bag filled with her supplies. "You need to get going. They'll be on the move within the hour."

"You'll see Will again, but we have to go for right now okay? We have a new home waiting for us." Niall slings the bag over her shoulder, shifting at the noticeable weight difference adjusting Teagan on her hip.

William kneels down and takes Aedan by the shoulders. "Hey, don't worry. Just remember what I taught you, okay? You get to protect mummy and Teagan now."

The small boy nods and hugs his friend tightly before grabbing his mum's free hand.

"Thank you both. For everything." She sighs before walking off, leaving the small home behind.

They're back in the forest and well into the trees when they hear the crack of gunfire coming from the small town they had left.

Teagan cries against her mother, scared of the loud noises behind them. Aedan is always a foot or two behind, covering their tracks and watching for the bad guys.

Niall hugs Teagan close, kissing her head multiple times and rocking her. "Shh, baby, you'll be alright. It's okay."

They continue like that for most of the day. They only stop by a stream for some water and a small portion of bread and a mashed carrot for Teagan.

A few times Aedan thought he saw someone behind them, but he passed it off as the shadows playing tricks on him. "Mummy? Are the Fairy Folk real?"

"Fairy folk? No, baby, they're just bedtime stories." Niall sighs exhaustedly, trying to shift Teagan around before her arms fall asleep.

Aedan frowns. "Daddy said that if we traveled through the woods at night, they'd help light the way." He squints as he tries to see their own footsteps in the dark.

"I think it's time we rest." Niall settles down on the ground pulling the blankets wrapped around Teagan closer, looking up at her son.

He nods and steps a little bit away from her. "I'll take first watch." It's something he had heard William tell his men when they were all turning in for the night.

"No, you're going to sleep." She's not going to have her seven year old stay up late.

"But what if someone tries to hurt us during the night?" Aedan says quietly as he tries to search through the dense trees for the bad guys.

"No one hurt us before when we were out here. Aedan, we'll be fine." Niall kisses his forehead, lying Teagan out on the ground bundled in her blanket.

Though still worried, Aedan nods slowly and lays down next to his sister. "You sure, mummy?"

"I'm sure, baby. Go to sleep, you need to rest." Niall spreads out a blanket for Aedan, tucking him in with another.

He nods and yawns, quickly succumbing to his need for sleep.

Niall does a quick scan of the forest before lying back and settling beside her kids.

\------------

He peers out from behind the trees. He's been following her for a few days now, hiding in the woods while she gallivanted around with those filthy English bastards. He doesn't know how she could let her guard down so easily.

Quietly through the trees he goes, making his way into the small clearing and seeing her there. Without thinking, he creeps up alongside her and lets his fingers trail up her thigh. His forces his hand over her mouth quickly.

Niall wakes up struggling against the hand against her mouth, fighting at the unknown figure grabbing her from behind.

"Don't fight it. If you do, I'll wake the children and they can watch." The man's voice is gruff and close to her ears.

Niall freezes, glares ahead when she recognizes that voice- Darragh.

Darragh holds her close to him and lets his hands roam across her chest. "Been following you. How dare you stay in that dirty bastard's home."

"Dirty bastard? I served with his father, you filthy asshole." Niall grabs at his wrists until she remembers what he said about waking the children up.

"Doesn't change the fact that he's unwanted in Ireland." Darragh says venomously. "Now, keep quiet or Aedan gets to watch you get taken again."

Niall glares at him, she can't believe he would do this. Before he had been so kind and loving, a great friend of Sean's and now here he is.

Darragh pulls her away from the children slightly and starts to undo her dress. He doesn't want to leave a single trace. He doesn't want anyone to know. "You should probably know that Bressie is heading for Dublin. Once he takes that, Belfast will be impossible to reach. You might want to take the ferry from Dublin to Holyhead."

"Why are you doing this?" Niall whispers harshly. Darragh is going to take advantage of her, but is also telling her where to go.

"Because as much as Sean was my friend, I love you more. I told him at that memorial service that I thought you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. I can't let Bressie hurt you or your children more than he already has." Darragh whispers back, dropping her dress to the side once he gets it off of her.

"Then why do you want to hurt me?" Niall asks quietly. They had been close, friends really.

He doesn't answer. He tightens his grip around her wrists and gets his trousers down just enough before pressing against her entrance. "Don't make a sound," he whispers as he pushes inside her.

Niall bites her tongue and shakes her head, mumbling quietly. "This isn't love. You don't do this to someone you love."

Darragh grits his teeth as he pulls out of her and pushes right back in. "I said quiet." He yanks her hair, pulling her hair so her head is back at an awkward angle.

Niall closes her eyes and tries to think of anyone else, Harry is the first to come to mind. She misses him so much, he would protect her.

He continues, using her and taking what he wanted. He holds her close, fingers digging into her waist and chest. Every now and then he'll force her face sideways so he can press their lips together, but it's chaste and not at all sweet. His breathing quickly becomes laboured and with a moan so soft and quiet he comes inside of her. "Jesus, Niall."

Niall just curls away from him and cries quietly. She's been so good at being emotionless, but it's too much now- too overwhelming.

Darragh fixes himself so he's presentable before moving her as best he can to redress her. He stays quiet as her gets her ready and lays her next to her children again.

He leans down and kisses her hair, tucking a blanket around tightly. "Sweet dreams, love."

Niall refuses to acknowledge him, wrapping her arm around her children muffling the sounds of her crying.

\------------

"Aedan." Niall says, shaking his shoulder. It hurts leaning over Teagan to do so, everything hurts.

The boy is awake immediately, looking around with suspicion. "Mummy?"

"It's time to go." Niall slowly stands, wincing at the pain burning through her.

Aedan frowns. "Are you okay, mummy? Are you hurt?" He stands and makes his way around his sister to make sure his mum is okay.

"Yeah, baby, just slept wrong." Niall shrugs wrapping one arm around his shoulders, pulling him in for a hug.

Aedan frowns, but doesn't question it as he hugs her back. He starts to pack up their stuff and tears off a piece of bread for Niall and an even smaller piece for himself. "We can feed Teagan when we reach a river."

Niall takes the offered piece of bread from his hands, being careful to pick up her daughter and the bags once they're packed. She winces again at the sharp pain.

"I'm carrying Teagan." Aedan says with a pout. He wants to help and his mummy is in too much pain for this.

"You'll drop her Aedan, she's too heavy for you." As much as it would help she doesn't want something to happen to either of them, she has to be strong and pull through.

"Mummy, I can do it. Please. I just want to help." Aedan says, pleading for a chance to be useful.

Niall sighs and stares down at him. "If she gets too heavy you tell me immediately, okay? I don't want either of you to get hurt."

Aedan nods quickly and reaches out for his sister. "Come on, Teagan. Mummy needs a rest."

Niall carefully hands Teagan over, making sure Aedan has a hold of her before she lets go. It's honestly such a relief. "Now let's get going towards that river."

\------------

Niall almost collapses when they finally reach a river, her feet ache and her thighs burn she isn't sure how much longer she could have kept it up. "We're going to take a break here."

Aedan nods and sets Teagan down on the grass to sit and play. "Should we get Teagan's food now, mummy?"

"Can you feed her? Mummy needs a bath." She feels so dirty, she can still feel Darragh.

Aedan nods and grabs the metal bowl that he had seen his mum use before when making Teagan's food. He quickly filled it with water before frowning. "Mummy, I need fire."

Niall sighs and grabs whatever sticks are in reach, which aren't much, and bends down almost crying out at the stretch and burn. She tries breathing through her nose, taking a minute to calm down.

Aedan looks at his mum in concern before smiling as she starts a small fire. "Thank you, mummy. I can do it from here."

"Be careful, don't burn yourself." Niall walks a few feet downstream to keep from her kids seeing her but she could still keep an eye on him. She undresses slowly, shivering as she steps into the cold stream.

He nods as he starts to boil the water. He turns to Teagan and smiles brightly. "Mummy is the best. I wish daddy was here to make her happy again."

Teagan babbles gibberish other than occasionally saying mum and something that vaguely sounded like brother.

Niall is scrubbing her skin raw, trying to get rid of the feeling of Darragh inside her. God what would Sean think? She splashes water across her face if not to pretend that the wetness below get cheeks isn't tears. She's stronger than this, she has to be. Sean would tell her to get her shit together for the sake of her children.

She finishes up, skin red and her hair wet pulling her dress back up her bruised body and joining her kids.

"Daddy was the best. He gave the greatest hugs and always told me that mummy would protect me no matter what." Aedan says as he fishes the boiled carrots from the pot and begins to mash them. "Mummy will protect you too. You're littler so she loves you more."

Niall clears her throat, smiling softly at her son. "Well aren't you a good boy helping mummy."

Aedan blushes and shrugs. "Daddy said to take care of you and Teagan so that's what I'm doing."

Niall leans down and kisses his cheek. "Do you want me to feed her or do you want to?"

"Can you do it? I want to nap. I didn't sleep good last night." The boy says with a yawn.

"Of course, baby." Niall starts making him a bed, kissing his forehead and bundling him up.

He smiles sleepily as he rolls over and away from his mother.

"Mum mum," Teagan says with a giggle as she reaches out for her mother.

"Can't forget about you." Niall picks her daughter up, settling her in her lap, spoon feeding her the mashed vegetables.

Teagan eats them happily. She sticks her fingers in the bowl and smears some across her mother's face. She shrieks in laughter at the orange against pale skin.

Niall starts to laugh smearing a little on her cheek. "Silly girl, you're supposed to eat it!"

The small girl just laughs more as she sticks her fingers in her mouth. She yawns around her small hand and rests her head against Niall's shoulder. "Daddy."

Niall's stomach clenches. "He's watching over you, making sure you're safe and sound. You and Aedan both."

Teagan looks up at her confused. She doesn't understand that her dad is gone forever. The girl's eyes follow her finger up and soon she's looking at clouds. She smiles and waves up at nothing.

"Why don't you take a nap?" She kisses Teagan's nose lying her daughter on her chest.

Yawning once more, Teagan lets her eyes close and for her breathing to even out in sleep.

\------------

Aedan hefts Teagan up as they walk. It's been a painful two hours. He's noticed that his mum is hurt and doesn't want to hurt her further, but Teagan is starting to grow heavy in his arms. "Mummy? Can we please stop for a minute? My arms hurt."

Niall looks back at her son. "Why don't you let me take her? You need a break anyway, sweetheart."

"Because I can do it. I can carry her. I just need a rest." He says adamantly. He told his dad that he'd take care of them and he can't have his mummy hurting this way.

"Alright, let's sit down." Niall helps Aedan lay Teagan down on the blanket grabbing his arm after. "Your mammy taught me a trick when I was younger whenever my arms or legs hurt."

Aedan crawls into his mother's lap and looks up at her with a smile. "What was it, mummy?"

Niall presses her thumbs into his arm beginning to massage the tissue she can feel beneath the surface. "I know it feels uncomfortable right now, but you'll feel much better afterwards."

He squirms around in her lap. It's more than uncomfortable, it really hurts. He puts up with it though because he knows mummy wouldn't lie to him. "Can we have a bit more bread?"

"Of course," Niall lets go of his arm long enough to get the loaf out breaking a piece of it off and handing it to her son, getting back to massaging his arm before moving on to the other.

He eats it greedily. It's been two days since leaving William's town and their food is in short supply. He's been feeding his mum and Teagan and saving up for his mum instead of eating like he should. "Where are we going, mum?"

"Clonmel, it should only be a mile or two away now. You'll get a warm bed and we'll stock up on food again." Niall promises letting his arms rest.

Aedan looks over at his sleeping sister and feels quite jealous that she doesn't have to deal with any on this. "Are we staying there long?"

"No, just for a night to restock and sleep." Niall wraps her arms around him, hugging him close.

"Mummy..." Aedan isn't sure he should ask, but it's been bothering him. "How did daddy die?"

"He," Niall clears her throat. How does she explain this to her son? "Some very bad men found us and your daddy saved us."

"Was it the English?" Aedan doesn't understand why people keep saying the English are bad people. Every Englishman he's met has been nice to him.

"No, they were Irish." Niall runs her fingers through his hair holding him close.

Aedan is silent, clutching at his mother's shirt. He wonders if this is really how the world works. "I miss daddy. I don't want to be Irish anymore."

"Baby... Not all Irish are like that. There were some bad Irish men, but they're not all like that. Am I bad? Was your daddy bad?"

"But you're English. You always get along with them. Daddy... Daddy didn't like the English very much. When I went with him to his parties, he would be mean to them." Aedan remembers well the IRA meetings he was dragged to and how the men there- including his father- would curse the English.

"Daddy found out the English were nice that's why he wanted to leave." How does she explain this?

The small boy stays silent, not really sure what to think. "Are we going to live with the English?"

"Yes." Niall tilts Aedan's chin up to make eye contact. "I know you're scared, I'm a little scared too, but I'm always going to protect you, Aedan."

He smiles lightly and nods, hugging his mother tightly. "And I'm going to protect you. I promised daddy I would."

"We'll protect each other and your sister." Niall just holds him tight.

It's quiet for a few moments until Teagan awakes and begins to cry. She's full on wailing and looking around for someone to hold her.

Niall immediately reaches down and picks her up, cooing at her.

Aedan frowns. "Do you want me to carry her, mummy? It's only a little bit farther."

"Aedan, I'm okay now. I can take her." Niall hugs her close, getting to her feet and slinging the bag over her shoulder.

He still looks skeptical, but nods slowly. "Okay. We should probably hurry along then. The sun is starting to go down."

Niall wonders how much Will taught him, her son seems to be an entirely new person. "You're right. We'll get there."

Aedan smiles brightly and lets his mother lead the way. "Come on then. It's getting dark faster now."

Niall ruffles his hair and picks up her pace. It doesn't take long before she sees lights and realises they're on the outskirts of town. "We're here."

Aedan smiles and looks at the town. It's smaller than Mallow, but it looks like it has ten times the amount of people. "How do we know they'll help us?"

"I have a letter." Niall leads him in, looking around until she sees an inn next to a diner. "You hungry?"

His stomach growls loudly before he can protest. "A little..." He doesn't want his mum to know that he's been skipping meals so they last longer with food.

"Well you can eat as much as you want." Niall leads him inside, the little bell above the door chiming.

The man behind the counter looks up with a smile. "Well hello there! Take a seat wherever and I'll be right with you."

Niall nods and smiles, ushering Aedan towards a booth near the back. "Get whatever you want."

The waiter quickly brings them some water and smiles brightly at them. "You must be from another town. I've not seen you around here before. My name's Josh, by the way."

"I'm Niall and these are my kids Aedan and Teagan. Also, do you by chance have a highchair? I need to sit my daughter somewhere." She smiles softly.

The entire restaurant goes silent as her voice drifts through the establishment.

Josh looks nervously down at his notepad. "Um, ma'am, I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to ask you to leave. We don't serve the Irish here."

Niall frowns. "I have a letter here from an English general, explaining that you have to serve me Irish or not."

There's a murmur through the diner and Josh is blushing as the attention is focused on him and this woman. "It's not my call, ma'am. You'll have to see General Payne. He's the one who put the rules in place."

"Where is he then? I'm trying to feed my children." Niall asks calmly.

"The big building at the end of the road. It's basically town hall." Josh says as he points in the general direction.

"This is absolutely ridiculous, they're young children for Christ's sake." Niall tries not to react, leading Aedan towards the building once she's spotted it.

General Payne looks up from his desk as his doors are thrown open. When he sees a woman and two children standing there, he rolls his eyes. "Clerk, give them five shillings and send them on their way."

"I'm not here for five shillings! I want to be served in this town!" Niall holds the letter out in front of her body waving it a little.

The man sighs and snatches the paper from hand, opening it and reading over it carefully. "When did you get this letter?"

"A few days ago, from Private William Tomlinson." Niall watches him read over the paper, waiting.

“Well, you’ll forgive us for being a bit over cautious. Mallow have been utterly destroyed since the date of this letter.” He scoffs and looks to her.

"D-Destroyed?" Niall falters, eyes widening at his words. Destroyed? It can't be true.

"It's been burned to the ground. I have a few men in the town who survived, but most are unaccounted for and most were trapped when the fire started." He says angrily as he snaps his pencil in half in the frustrations.

"Did William Tomlinson make it out? Is he one of the survivors?" Niall tries to remain sensible but the thought of William hurt.

The man shakes his head. "We've heard nothing from Tomlinson.

Niall tries to hold onto the hope that he made it out, he had to have there's no way he couldn't.

"Miss... Cullen, is it? You have to realise why we're hesitant about letting the Irish into our borders. The IRA is becoming increasingly bold with their attacks."

"I understand, but they're the very people who murdered my husband. I am seeking permanent residence in an English controlled city."

General Payne sighs. "Fine. You can only stay for two nights though. And if the IRA attack once you've gone, we'll be sending word ahead that you're their spy." He scribbles a note onto an official looking paper and hands it over, knocking a picture frame over in the process.

Niall automatically looks down at the frame lying crooked across the desktop, almost freezing when she sees it. A picture of Liam. "General Payne, you're Liam's dad."

The older man looks up at the girl, a hard and emotionless look on his face. "I was Liam's dad. That's just a memory now."

"I served with your son, did he ever mention a Niall Horan?" She can't help pick up the framed photo running her fingers across Liam's face.

"Maybe to his mother. I was fighting in the war as well. The last time I saw him was when he was enlisting as a medic." General Payne says slowly as if he isn't trying to hold back his tears. He clears his throat a few more times trying to get himself under control.

"We were bunked together with Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles, and Zayn Malik." Her heart swells saying their names."

He looks up at the names. "He wrote about Harry and Zayn a lot. I think Karen said that they went through basic together." He sighs and covers his eyes to ensure he didn't cry. "They all died except Harry. Now all these young men are dying because the Irish don't want peace."

"If it's any consolation your son was very brave. Risked his life to stitch me up when I took a bullet to the side. But I hope you know that he's not forgotten." She looks down at Aedan, smiling. "Remember what I told you about Liam?"

He nods solemnly. "You said he was the happiest person you ever met. You said he got really sad when someone was hurt."

Niall nods. "I would tell my son stories about your son and the others, how they made such a difference in my life."

General Payne frowns. "I still need you out of town in two days time."

Niall bows her head. "I understand, sir. If you'll just allowed us to be serviced."

"Of course. I'll fill your provisions before you leave as well. It's what Liam would have done." The general says quietly.

"Thank you, sir." Niall squeezes Aedan's hand. Things would hopefully get easier.

\------------

Niall waits in the room she had been instructed to, fingers tapping against the chair. She had left Aedan and Teagan in their room back at the inn sleeping, locking the door behind her.

There's a quick knock on the door before its opened and a doctor comes in looking at the woman's charts. "Niall is it? Hello, I'm Jay. Usually, I'm a midwife, but I do have a full nurse's training. What seems to be the problem here?"

"I was assaulted outside the city a few nights ago, I'd like to get checked for... Damage." Niall looks at her lap awkwardly.

The woman nods and makes a quick note in her chart before setting it aside. "Alright. What area are you most concerned about? We'll start there and work our way out from there."

"I just wanted to make sure there isn't any serious tearing and... He wasn't wearing anything. I'd like to make sure I'm not with child." That's the last thing Niall can handle.

"Well, it's too early to tell if you’re pregnant. I can definitely make sure you're healthy though." The nurse says with a sympathetic smile. "Just lean back and let me get a look, okay? I promise I'll be as gentle as I can."

Niall nods and leans back, hands grabbing the armrests of the chair so hard her knuckles turn a shade of white.

Jay carefully moves the skirt and underdress aside and begins her examination. "Whoever he was, he definitely wasn't gentle. There's a bit of swelling and inflammation, but luckily no tearing." She looks up at the woman. "I'm going to spread some antibacterial cream around so that we can make sure you're clean and such. It'll also help with the pain and should help the swelling as well."

Niall nods her head, relieved it's not as bad as she thinks it is. "Thank you, doctor."

The woman nods and hums lightly as she begins her work. "Trust me, I understand the pain of after sex. Granted all of mine has been consensual, but I did have seven children."

"I've had two, the pain was bearable with my husband." He'd always make sure she was feeling alright.

"Husbands are the best. Well, usually. I'm on number three so hopefully he works out better than the last two." Jay chuckles as she finishes up and puts Niall's skirt back down.

"Hopefully. I'm actually going to meet a man that I've been a little in love with for awhile." Niall smiles softly.

"Really now? He must be a really good lover to have you traveling cross country to get to him with two children."

Niall flushes pink and shrugs. "I'd be a lot safer with him. He's a general actually."

Jay raises as an eyebrow as she scribbles the girl's information onto the chart. "A general? Must be a very important man then. I know a few generals. Left my girls and youngest son with one in London before coming to Ireland to help."

"Do you know a General Styles then?" She asks, the chances are small, but she asks anyway.

Her smile falters. "He was a captain when I met him. Right after the Great War, he was in Doncaster to visit my family. He told us my son was one of the greatest men he had met in the battlefield. He was quite the charmer."

"He definitely charmed me." Niall chuckles, until there's a question in her mind. "Who was your son?"

"Captain Louis William Tomlinson. Harry told me how he was killed and I just wish he would never have been so stupidly irresponsible." Her voice grows quieter as she talks. "He knew he wasn't allowed to die. He... He had a pregnant fiancé and five little sisters and a baby brother to come home to. It's... Why would he be so stupid and take his helmet off?"

Niall closes her eyes. "I served with Louis. Did he ever mention a Niall Horan?"

"In his letters. Said he was a fine young man with a tragic past. Said I would have to to meet him one day and... Wait, wait, wait. He said you were a man."

"Everyone thought I was, they wouldn't let me join if they knew I was a woman." Of course Louis wouldn't say, if their letters were read she would have been found out.

Jay looks over the girl before her and takes in the information. "He called you his best friend. He said you were the only one he could trust with everything."

Niall smiles, she didn't realize she meant that much to him. "He was my best friend as well."

"Have you met the others' parents? Obviously you met Liam's father, but you must meet Zayn's family. They took his death so hard. It actually broke their family apart."

Niall looks at her hands. "It's my fault Zayn is dead. It should have been me instead of him."

Jay frowns. "Trisha will never let you say again. She's proud of her son. Yaser on the hand... Well, the fact you're a woman will probably change a lot of things."

"Would it be better if I don't meet them? I don't think I could take being accused by his own family."

She thinks for a moment. "I'll write them a letter and explain everything. Trisha has always expressed an interest in meeting any of Zayn's war buddies."

Niall nods. "Maybe one day I'll meet them. Right now, I need to get my children to London."

"Of course. I don't want to impede your journey." Jay says softly with a light smile.

There's a knock on the door before a young nurse sticks her head in. "Nurse Jay? There's a woman in room six who needs immediate attention."

Niall looks back at the woman. "That's probably my cue to leave. It was nice to meet you."

"Same, love." Jay kisses her cheek and hands her the bottle of antibacterial cream before hurrying out the door.

\------------

Aedan frowns as he looks over the fruit and vegetable selection at the marketplace. He knows that Teagan likes carrots and potatoes, but what else?

Niall adjusts Teagan on her hip, chatting up a few of the women she had ended up running into.

The small boy scurries over to his mother and tugs on her skirt. "Mummy, what fruit and vegetables does Teagan like?"

One of the women coos. "Is this your little boy? He's too adorable!"

"Looks just like his father." Niall smiles and runs her fingers through his hair. "She likes potatoes, carrots, and turnips." The mother looks at her son questioningly.

He smiles shyly at the woman before waving at her and taking off to the fruits and vegetables again. Smiling up at the vendor, he starts to look over the display. He takes the money from his pocket to count how much he had.

The man smiles down at the small boy. "What can I do for you lad? We have some chocolates that just came in?"

"I need potatoes and turnips." Aedan says shyly. He holds up the money his mother had given him to buy himself a treat.

The man nods and smiles looking around to see no one nearby. "How about I give you those chocolates for free?"

Aedan smiles shyly. "If you think so, sir. I just need to get food for my baby sister."

"For a lovely lad like you." He wraps the vegetables and gets a few chocolates in a separate bag, along with a few candies for the baby.

"Thank you. How much do I owe you?" He stretches up on his tippy toes to reach the bags and hand the man his money.

"It's your lucky day. Why don't you go on and get back to your mum?" He looks over at the blonde facing away from them.

Aedan looks surprised, but nods nonetheless. "Thank you, sir. Are you sure you won't take any of it?"

"I'm sure, now go on." He waves the small child off turning around to help another customer.

Heading back to his mother, Aedan smiled brightly as he handed the bags to her. "Mummy! Mummy, look it!"

Niall looks down and smiles. "You bought food? You didn't have to do that baby."

"He wouldn't let me pay." Aedan says as he hands her the money he gave her with his other hand.

"Did you say thank you?" She stashes the money away, hoisting Teagan up a little.

He nods fervently. "I even tried to give him money lots of times."

"Alright." Niall takes the food and pushes it in her bag, leaning down to kiss him. "Good job, love."

"We should probably try to get Teagan a different outfit since she's starting to outgrow the one Daddy bought for her." Aedan says with a triumphant smile.

"Daddy would be extremely proud of you, Aedan." She hopes it'll make him feel better, this whole thing had been tough on him.

A blush fills the boy's face as he looks at the ground. "I just miss him. I want him to know that I can take care of you guys."

"And you are. He's watching you, Aedan; he already knows." Niall hugs him before fully standing up.

\------------

Geoff Payne was a man a few emotions and even fewer words. It hurt a hell of a lot more than he let anyone know when he found out his only son had been killed. He remembers coming home and expecting to see him standing there with his sisters and mother, but instead it was his sisters, mother, and a neatly folded Union Jack.

Meeting someone who had served with his son and spoke so highly of him hurt in every way imaginable. He wanted to help the woman though, so that's why he found himself outside her inn room at eight in the evening.

Sighing heavily, he knocked.

Niall leaves Aedan watching the television while he lied in bed next to his sister who was already sleeping. She shrugs on her light coat and opens the door surprised to see the man standing there. "General Payne, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

He clears his throat and grips tighter to the bag in his hand. "I asked around town as to what you had bought. I noticed a severe lack of clothing and shoes for your little boy. When you all were in my office the other day, it was clear that his shoes are obviously too small."

Niall sighs and nods. "He's getting big, but shoes are expensive and we don't have the money to replace them right now."

"That's why I have these." He pulls out a pair of little boy's hiking shoes. "There's also a new outfit and a summer coat in there for him."

Niall smiles softly down at the shoes then up at him. "Thank you so much, you really didn't have to."

The man shrugs. "He reminds me of Liam at that age. My son had a tendency to forget his own needs and help others first."

"He's really been trying to watch over Teagan and I. He promised his father he would." She grows quiet thinking about Sean.

"What are you going to do now that their father is gone? Will you remarry or...?" Geoff suddenly feels responsible for the well being of this small family.

"I'm going to meet General Styles. I don't know what will happen." Niall sighs.

The man nods and looks to the clock in her room. "I should let you sleep. You have an early day tomorrow. I'm sorry that you can't stay here longer."

"It's alright, thank you for everything you've been able to do for us." She kisses his cheek and smiles.

"If you'd like, my wife and I would love to have breakfast with you three before you journey on. Maybe in the diner around seven?" He asks quietly, seeing the sleeping children down the hall.

"That sounds wonderful, we'll be there." After they exchange goodbyes Niall slips into bed next to her children, snuggling close to them.

Aedan squirms a bit, waking up and looking at his mother. "Is General Styles going to be our new daddy?"

Niall is silent for a long moment, long enough she isn't sure if he's still awake. "He'll never replace your father, but he'll help."

\------------

The bell above the door in the diner chimes as Niall enters, thanking Aedan for opening it. She looks around, smiling when she spots General Payne and his wife.

Aedan scampers over to the table in his new clothes and shoes and smiles up at the two adults there. "Mummy said you got these for me."

Geoff smiles and nods. "Indeed we did. I know how much you sacrifice to make sure your sister and mummy are safe. You deserve them, little soldier."

Niall musses his hair walking by, sliding into the empty booth across from the other two adults. "He really is."

Karen smiles brightly and looks at the small girl attached the woman. "I've heard so much about Aedan, but who is this delightful little girl?"

"This is Teagan. She's a little over a year." Niall moves Teagan's hand which happens to be wrapped around her finger, making her wave.

"Well hello, Miss Teagan. You're going to be a stunning young woman some day. I can already guarantee your dark curls will be breaking hearts." Karen says as she waves back and reaches forward to the little girl.

"Can she hold you?" She looks down at her little girl for any sign that she wouldn't want that. When her daughter just looks at her she's careful to hand her over.

Karen takes the small child and cradles her to her chest wanting to keep her warm and safe. "I miss having kids this small. Liam was our youngest and he hated to be coddled."

Geoff nods and smiles when he sees the waiter. "I ordered a little bit of everything breakfast for us, by the way. I want you all to eat until full."

"I don't know how I'll ever repay the both of you. Thank you for welcoming us." She wraps her arm around Aedan pulling him close.

Teagan yawns and leans against Karen's chest. She promptly starts to doze off.

When the food is brought to the table, Aedan's eyes widen. "Is this for us, mummy?"

"Eat as much as you want, love. There's enough for everyone." She moves their utensils so that the waitress can set it all down.

Geoff smiles and puts two pancakes, some eggs, bacon, and cornbeef hash on a plate. "Here you go, Aedan."

The small boys eyes widen and his smile is huge. "Can I really eat all that?"

"Yes, that's for you." Niall smiles softly at the way his eyes light up, kissing the crown of his head

"So, Niall," Karen asks as they all begin to load up plates, "what's the final destination? You can't just be lugging these children around the country for fun."

"London, we're meeting Harry there." Niall chops some food up for Teagan, looking up at Karen.

"Harry? Is he helping you get situated then? Such a nice boy. He truly is one of the nicest." She shifts the sleeping girl in her arms so she can eat the plate her husband had made for her.

"He doesn't know we're coming. In fact I don't know if he knows what happened to Sean." Niall sighs.

Geoff hums. "He knows. We got communications the other day to report if any of us come into contact with you. Apparently English intelligence found Sean and he wants to make sure you're safe."

"Does he know we're headed to London as well?" Niall asks, paying more attention to the man than to eating.

"Not that I know of. He's been asking us to relay any information that we can to him." Geoff says before taking a hefty sip of coffee. "Do you want me to tell him that you're on your way?"

"Yes, I want to ease his mind somewhat." He wouldn't be so calm when he finds out what she's had to endure, but she would tell him that later.

Karen smiles and runs her fingers through Teagan's hair as she stirs awake. "So what's the plan with Harry?"

"Not really sure. He and I have always had a... Connection. I'm hoping he can help us out." Niall hasn't really thought about that or what she wants.

Aedan looks up from where he's shoving pancakes into his mouth. "He's going to be Teagan and I's new daddy." His voice is a little bitter sounding.

"Aedan," Niall scalds him. She's not even sure if that's what it's going to be.

He looks back down, not wanting to say how he feels about the situation.

Geoff clears his throat. "I'll let him know you're on your way then."

"Thank you." Niall begins to eat her breakfast, somewhat relaxed.

\------------

Aedan walks quickly after his mum as they make their way through the woods. He notices that she seems to in minimal pain since her doctor's visit and he's happy that she's better.

Teagan is biting at her shoulder, feeling the urge to naw on something. "Mum mum."

Niall continues to walk, looking down at her daughter in her arms. "You hungry? Want food?"

"Hurts," the small child mumbles as she chomps on her fingers.

"I think her teeth are starting to come in. She's been uncomfortable in the gum area." Aedan says with a shrug.

Niall stops and searches around in her bag until she finds a piece of cloth, holding it out to Aedan. "Tie this into a tight knot for me."

Aedan does as he's told and hands the finished product back to his mother. He's not watching where he's going though and the next thing he knows, he's on the ground and his ankle is throbbing in pain. "Jesus!"

"Aedan!" Niall sets Teagan down putting the knot into her mouth and telling her to chew on it. She turns towards her son, running her fingers along his leg. "Tell me where it hurts."

Tears run down the boy's face as he points to his ankle. "There. My ankle. It hurts so bad, mummy. Jesus, it hurts."

Niall doesn't know what to do. She's carried both of them before, but she doesn't know if she can do it again. "It's okay, lovebug, it'll be alright."

Aedan wipes at the tears as he tries to stand. He whimpers as he puts any weight on his ankle. "I can't walk on it, mummy."

"Why don't we rest here for now?" It's the only thing she can think to do given the current situation.

He slumps down to the ground and grabs his ankle. It's hot and slightly swelled and he rubs it lightly. "Daddy would know how to fix my ankle."

Niall takes the cloth out of Teagan's mouth just to tear off a good chunk of it before putting it back in. "I don't know how to fix it but I can help it." She goes to the small stream next to them to drench it in ice cold water, tying it around his ankle to provide some relief.

"I miss daddy." Aedan says as he sniffles. He looks miserably at his ankle and goes about wiping at his nose.

"I miss him too, love." She sits next to him, pulling him into her side.

Aedan leans into her embrace. "I don't want Harry to be my new daddy. I don't want a new daddy at all."

"Aedan, he's not your new daddy and he never will be. He can never replace him." Niall kisses his head.

"So you won't marry him like you married daddy? You don't love him?" He smiles at that. He doesn't want anyone with his mum.

Niall frowns, she's not sure if she can really answer that truthfully when she doesn't even know herself. "I love you, Aedan."

He winces as his ankle twinges a bit, but he smiles nonetheless. "I love you too, mummy. I promise that I'll take care of you and Teagan in London too."

"Aedan," Niall says again looking down at him. "I don't love Teagan more than you. She might need more attention, but I don't love her more. I absolutely love and adore you just as much."

Aedan shrugs. "You have to say that. It's your job as my mum."

"But I really mean it." She grabs his chin so they're making eye contact. "I love you."

"I love you too, mummy. I know that Teagan needs more attention, but since daddy left it just feels like I can't be a kid." Aedan says softly not wanting to make his mother angry.

"I want you to be a kid, Aedan. You don't need to be an adult." Niall runs her fingers through his hair.

"I have to be because daddy is gone. I need to be like daddy." Aedan says with a sad look. "He left me the rosary for a reason."

"Aedan, listen to me. Daddy doesn't want you to be exactly like him. He wants you to be a kid. He gave you that rosary so that you'll still have hope that everything will be alright."

Aedan is silent. He knows he needs to protect his family, but now his mum is saying he needs to be a kid. "I'll try."

"Thank you. Now, I need you to rest up alright?" She cuddles him close, lying his head on her chest.

He yawns and curls up close to his mother. He just wants to feel protected once more instead of feeling like he needs to protect.

\------------

Niall holds Teagan close to her chest, her other hand holding Aedan's while they walk further. He's still limping and she's hoping he's okay. "We're almost there, love. Not too much farther."

Aedan whimpers with every step. His ankle hasn't gotten better and he's been wondering if it's more than just a simple ouch. "I can make it, mummy."

"Are you sure?" Niall doesn't want him to be in pain, she'd rather carry the both of them.

He nods. He won't complain until they're safe in a town. "Yeah. I can... I can do it, mummy."

Niall looks at her eldest, stopping to make sure she gets a proper look at him. "Are you absolutely sure?"

"No," his eyes well up with tears as he collapses onto the forest floor.

Niall immediately stops, kneeling down as best as she can with Teagan in her arms. "I can carry you if you need."

"But you can't carry Teagan and me." Aedan wipes at his tears. "Do you want to just leave me here and take Teagan to the next town?"

"I've carried you both before I can do it again." There's no way she's leaving anyone behind.

"I'm too big." Aedan says sadly. He knows that his mum can't carry them both.

"Aedan, come here." She leans down to allow him to get on her back.

He looks at her skeptically. "You sure? I don't want you to carry too much." Nevertheless, he scrambles as best he can over to his mother.

Niall isn't going to tell him that it's hard for her. She's going to try to carry the both of him, she'll do what she can at least.

Teagan squeals in delight as Aedan is now in her sights. She reaches out for her brother and clasps hands with him over their mother's shoulder.

Aedan smiles, but hides his face in the crook of his mother's neck as his ankle is jostled as they carry on.

Niall's having a hard time. She was having a hard time with Teagan to begin with, but this is different with two kids. She's trying to balance both of them and it's probably her determination that's allowing her to do it in the first place.

Aedan tries his best not to cry, but he can't help it. It just hurts too much.

Teagan is squirming around, wanting to get down from her mother's arms. "Mummy, down!"

Niall stops, getting onto her knees to allow them both down without dropping either one of them.

Aedan slips off and grabs at his ankle. "I can make it the rest of the way. It's not too much farther... Right?"

"Aedan," Niall looks at her son and hugs him. She hates that he's in pain.

"Can we stay in town for a few more days? I don't know if I can walk on my ankle after this." Aedan says as he tries to figure a way around this injury.

"Of course, love. I'll have you see a doctor as well." It's a lucky thing General Payne had given her money.

He nods and looks up from the ground to see the edge of the forest and the fortifications of the next town. The flag above the entrance was the Irish rebels tricolour and he had a bad feeling about this place. "Mum, it's an Irish controlled city."

Niall nods and smiles, "it'll be alright we have the accent after all. They won't know the difference."

He nods and stands as gingerly as possible. "Do you want me to carry Teagan?"

"No, you're hurt." She hoists Teagan back up along with the bag. She hates that her son has to be put through this.

"You sure?" Aedan takes a painfully step towards the village and looks at his mother to be sure that she didn't need his help.

"Aedan, I'm positive. Now let's hurry." Well hurry as best as they can, but she wants to get him to a doctor fast.

He limps and hobbles along, trying his best to keep up. He keeps telling himself that they're almost there, but he doesn't feel like they're getting any closer.

"Do you need a break?" Niall asks over her her shoulder. She's worried about her son.

He shakes his head, teeth grinding into each other. If they stop, he won't be able to get back up. "Keep going, mummy."

"Alright." She's still cautious, doesn't want something worse to happen to him.

It's another few minutes before they make it to the edge of the city. Aedan leans against the old city's wall and hopes that they're safe here. He's ready to pass out from pain.

"Just a little farther, we just need to find a hotel." Niall looks around until she thinks she spots one.

A lady spots them and frowns. "Can I help you? I don't think I've seen you around town before."

"We want to get to Dublin, but we need a place to rest for a few days my son is injured." Niall moves so that she can see Aedan.

"Oh! There's a refugee hospital down the street and a shelter across from there. It's probably the best you'll be able to get. The city's been flooded as the English take control of other cities."

Niall nods, its better than nothing. "Just a little farther, Aedan. Then you can rest for a few days."

Aedan nods and does his best to hold in the whimpers and screams of pain that want to escape him. "Okay. We can make it."

"You're a strong little boy I know you can." She grabs his hand and leads him towards where the woman had pointed out.

The hospital smells like disinfectant and cries of young children can be heard everywhere. There's doctors and nurses running around every which way.

Aedan drops into the merest open chair and reaches up for his sister. "If you can get a doctor, I can hold her for you."

Niall nods and situates Teagan in Aedan's lap heading off to find someone. Eventually she spots a doctor, "excuse me, sir?"

A young fresh faced doctor turns and smiles at the woman. "Hello. How can I help you today, ma'am?"

"My son, he twisted his ankle pretty bad." Niall frowns and looks back at her son.

"We'll do our best, but we have others who are injured much worse than a twisted ankle." He picks up a clipboard from the nurses' desk and hands it to her. "Write his name and what's wrong with him and we'll get to him when we can."

"Is there anything I can do or give you to get him looked at sooner?" She's willing to pay for it.

The doctor gives her a quick once over and takes in her haggard appearance. "I'm sorry. He'll have to wait like everyone else."

Niall groans and fills out the paperwork refraining from tossing it at him.

"Thank you, ma'am. I'll keep you updated as best I can." He says with a sympathetic smile.

She heads back to her children, sitting next to them. "We'll have to wait a little, sweetheart."

Aedan nods as he plays with Teagan. "I've twisted my ankle before and it wasn't this painful. What if it's really bad?"

"We'll figure something out." She kisses his forehead trying to be reassuring.

It's another two hours before the same doctor comes out to Niall. His scrubs have blood on then and his once joyous smile seems worn out and tired, but he comes to her all the same.

"I have a break. Aedan? Let's get you checked out." He smiles as best he can and holds his hand out to help Niall from her chair.

"Thank you," Niall stands up with his help, picking Teagan up.

The doctor waves a wheelchair over to have Aedan wheeled into an examination room. "So how did this happen?"

"We were walking into town, my son wasn't paying attention to where he was walking." Niall explains.

The doctor starts to rotate the ankle, stopping immediately when the boy winced. "Hmmm, it might a bit more serious than a twist. Might be a sprain or even a fracture break."

Niall nods slowly. "Is there anything we can do to get it to heal faster? We can't be in town for long."

"Well, we'll take an X-ray just to be sure. If it's a sprain, rest and ice for a good three or four days should do it. If it's a break, it'll just have to heal naturally." The doctor says with a shrug.

Niall just nods again, hoping for the best. They can't be here for long, it would put them behind schedule.

Aedan hands Teagan back to their mother and smiles wanly. "Sorry, mum. I'll be more careful next time."

"Its alright sweetheart, it's not your fault." Which is true, it's not like it was on purpose.

The doctor wheels him away for his X-ray.

Twenty minutes later, they're back. "Good news! It's just a severe sprain."

Niall sighs in relief, smiling brightly at her son. "We'll just have to rest for a few days, but we'll be back on track."

"Stay off of it as best you can for three or four days. The longer, the better. You should be fine, maybe have a little bit of pain. If you have pain when you're leaving, come back and I'll get you some painkillers."

"Thank you, doctor. How much do I owe you?" There's no way it's free.

The doctor shrugs. "Nothing. It's a refugee hospital. Our services are free to people seeking shelter."

Niall is just as relieved to hear that, they need the money for the ferry ride anyhow. "Thank you again."

"No problem. If you need shelter, there's a refugee hotel across the street. They'll take you in." The doctor says with another smile. He grabs a compression wrap from the cabinet and quickly wraps Aedan's ankle tightly.

When everything is done Niall takes her children towards the makeshift hotel. Hopefully things would get easier.

\------------

Harry is pacing the office that he's been assigned to. He wants to be out there in Ireland searching for her, but all his injuries from the Great War have him confined to desk work. He looks up as his door is opened. "What?"

John Ryan, a newbie to the office but a veteran from the war, clears his throat. "I have a message for you, General Styles."

"Well what is it?" Harry snaps impatiently.

"General Payne, apparently he ran into a Niall Horan and two children. They're coming to London to see you."

Harry's eyes widen. "Did he say anything else? Come on, try and get another message from him!"

"They're doing alright, they don't seem to be harmed. She's already left town and headed for Dublin." He explains.

The man sighs and leans against his desk. "She'll be here soon then? When was this message sent?"

"A few days ago, but received minutes ago."

"Soon... She'll be here soon." Harry says with a smile. "Dismissed, Captain."

"I'll let you know if we get anything else." He nods his head and exits, leaving Harry in silence.

Harry picks up the picture he has of his old friend and looks at it longingly. "Just be safe. Dear god, be safe."


End file.
